Posts tagged:calvin klein

The Week in Celebrity Fashion

Cheerio, dear readers! Let’s check in with our favorite fashionable celebrities and see who wore who at the premieres of Harry Potter, Burlesque, and more!

Emma Watson in custom Calvin Klein at the New York premiere of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part I

Emma Watson

I didn’t love this look at first, but it grows on me the more I look at it. It’s as simple as simple gets, but that’s not a bad thing on a woman this beautiful. It’s sexy but demure, boyish but feminine. A total home run, worthy of the New York premiere of Harry Potter.

Emma Watson in custom Burberry Bespoke in London

This trench coat was custom made for Ms. Watson by Burberry’s Chief Creative Officer as a gift for the Potter premiere. It’s good to be Emma Watson in general, but better when your swag includes Ray Bans, a leather-sleeved Burberry trench and a giant studded purse.

Emma Watson in a Burberry trench in New York

More Burberry, of course. I’m simply loving the studded arms – studs have been trendy for awhile now, but  I’ve never seen them used quite like this. The dress underneath is preppy-sexy done right.

Emma Watson in a Burberry trench in New York

The perfect showcase of a day-to-evening coat. Pairing it with those fabulous stockings and badass boots changed her whole persona from prep perfection to biker chic.

Emma Watson arriving at the Late Show with David Letterman in New York

Let’s just say it – this bitch knows how to wear a coat! Absolutely stunning. The coat equivalent of a soul mate.

Emma Watson in Dion Lee in New York

Simply fabulous.

Daniel Radcliffe at the New York premiere of Harry Potter

Not loving the shirt, which reads a little more farmer boy than wizard hero, but the jacket fits him nicely.

Rupert Grint at the New York premiere of Harry Potter

Absolutely, unequivocally the best Ron Weasley has ever looked. And look at those shoes – what a fashionista! Who knew?

Glee’s Darren Criss at the New York premiere of Harry Potter

The love child of all my favorite pop culture phenomenons, this Glee star/Harry Potter parody sensation showed up like a total fanboy in his Gryffindor tie and super-excited grin. What a cutie!

Sarah Jessica Parker in Nicholas Kirkwood shoes at the New York premiere of Harry Potter

Sarah Jessica seems to have paired Bellatrix Lestrange’s costume with Carrie Bradshaw’s shoes. The result? A hot ghetto mess.

Kate Middleton in Issa, announcing her engagement to Prince William

Kate’s dress, and others by designer Issa, sold out in stores around the UK just days after Ms. Middleton announced her engagement to the one and only Prince William. Though I’ve always been more of a Team Harry girl (what can I say? I love me some ginger), I can’t deny that Kate Middleton might be the luckeist woman on earth. Not because she’s marrying Will, but because…

Kate Middleton in Princess Diana’s Garrard engagement ring

… she gets to wear Princess Di’s engagement ring. Yes, this gorgeous sapphire surrounded by diamonds was worn by Will’s mother, the iconic Princess Diana. Absolutely breathtaking.

Katy Perry in a Zac Posen dress and a Valeska necklace at the New York launch of her new fragrance, Purr

Great color and fits surprisingly well, considering Katy’s penchant for wearing all of her clothes a size too small. Not quite sure what’s happening with the hemline, but the fierce necklace and refreshingly normal hair and makeup are working for her. Overall? Quite delish.

Mandy Moore at the Los Angeles premiere of Tangled

Who let you out of the house like this, Mandy? Tell them this look stopped being cute twenty years ago, and get yourself a new stylist.

Christina Ricci in Peter Som at the CFDA/Vogue Fashion Fund Awards in New York

Ricci always has that look on her face that says, “Let’s just talk about how intriguing I am.” But she can give all the douche-face she wants if she keeps wearing such friggen adorable dresses. Although the black tights-red lipstick-severe bangs thing is getting a little trite.

Carey Mulligan in Chanel Haute Couture at the CFDA/Vogue Fashion Fund Awards in New York

Many called it matronly, and I think I’d agree if it were worn by anyone other than Ms. Carey Mulligan. But this little pixie can pull off things that normal women wouldn’t dream of. I think this dress is fantastic, and I think it feels like a modern garment inspired by fashion of yore. The necklace piece is stunning, and her hair has never looked better.

Rachel Bilson in a Chanel dress and Camilla Skovgaard sandals at an event in Los Angeles for the Museum of Contemporary Art

Rachel, I love you, but no matter how fabulous your dress and shoes are, I will not overlook your two-tone hair. Get your shit together and call your colorist.

Hilary Swank in Marchesa at the Governors Awards in Los Angeles

There’s a such thing as too much of a good thing, Hilary. We all love us some Marchesa, but there’s a time and place for an endless supply of ruffles, and this just ain’t it.

Leighton Meester in a Prabal Gurung dress and Roger Vivier shoes in New York

Totally fabulous. A unique, artistic dress that’s still youthful and flattering, and a killer pair of shoes. But that’s not all Leighton’s got for us this week…

Leighton Meester in a Marchesa jumpsuit and Harry Winston jewels

Leighton Meester

Dear readers, I wish I could tell you that your eyes are playing tricks on you. But sadly, this is reality. Leighton Meester wore a sheer low-cut lace harem-pant jumpsuit with no visible underwear. In public. On purpose. I’ll go ahead and call this a fashionpocalypse.

Christina Aguilera in Elie Saab at the Los Angeles premiere of Burlesque

She looks like a pregnant wax figure drag queen version of Christina Aguilera.

Cher at the Los Angeles premiere of Burlesque

She’s Cher. Who are we to judge? We wake up in the morning our mere mortal selves, and she is CHER. And her legs are still fantastic.

Alexa Chung in Valentino at the New York premiere of Love and Other Drugs

Stunning dress. Buy a hairbrush.

Anne Hathaway in a Valentino dress and Jimmy Choo clutch at the New York premiere of Love and Other Drugs

I’ll give it to Anne Hathaway – she could wear the stupidest dress on earth and still shine like a star because of how damn beautiful she is. This dress is a bit of a Christmas disaster, and looks retro to the point of costumey, but look at her eyes! Lips! Hair! She is a goddess.

Brad Goreski at GQ’s Men of the Year

Rachel Zoe’s former assistant Brad walks the red carpet at GQ‘s Men of the Year party. Dare to wear plaid, Brad. We love it.

Drake at GQ’s Men of the Year

Drake always looks delicious, and I never write about him. Let’s just appreciate a former Canadian teen soap opera actor turned rapper for being able to wear the shit out of a suit.

Cory Monteith at GQ’s Men of the Year

He looks like a middle-aged insurance salesman.

Chord Overstreet at GQ’s Men of the Year

Delish! Nice tie, interesting color suit, and the stupidest hairdo since Justin Bieber.

Harry Shum at GQ’s Men of the Year

Love me some Mike Chang, but I think this could fit better.

Kevin McHale at GQ’s Men of the Year

I usually think Artie looks the best out of all the Gleeks at red carpet events, but he really took it too far this time. The hair, the jacket, the shirt, the vest, the pocket square, those shoes – oy. Don’t use one event to show us every piece of clothing you own. It is possible to look both formal and funky without the whole thing falling apart.

Chris Colfer at GQ’s Men of the Year

Delectable. Definitely my personal Man of the Year.

Chris Colfer in OUT Magazine’s Annual Out 100 Issue

And just an extra shot of uber-gay for all the nerds out there – Glee‘s unstoppable Chris Colfer (Kurt Hummel) was honored in OUT Magazine’s Annual Out 100 Issue, which is exactly as gay as it sounds. I nearly wept looking at this photo of this angelic little boy grasping his Judy record next to her obituary in the news.

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Apparently the AMAs were tonight, so expect some truly trashy fashion on the blog later this week!

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© Democracy Diva, 2010.

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The Week in Celebrity Fashion

Blake Lively in Lanvin at the Scream 2010 Awards

This was one of the best looks from Paris Fashion Week, and Blake is nailing it. Not hard, mind you, because the dress does all the work for her. But I suppose we do need someone to stand in it and pull it open so the world can see her vag. Seriously, who poses like that? I’ve seen a dozen different pictures of this dress, and she’s basically a flasher in every one. But a leggy blonde in Lanvin is hard to beat, so she gets a free pass from me (in spite of her black toenail polish).

Kim Kardashian in Georges Hobeika at TAO New York's 10th Anniversaiy party

Problem 1: The breasts. Please look at those strange lines/wrinkles/dimples they make, like she has boobs extending out from boobs. That is so not the way nature-made breasts look.

Problem 2: The illusion of BUSH. I’m sure it’s just dark underwear, but who wears dark underwear under a see-through dress? It saddens me that no one thought to say, “Hey Kim, you’re fabulous, but you’re going a bit Vanessa Hudgens south of the border, so you may want to deal with that.”

Problem 3: The shoulders are like Lady Gaga crossed with angel wings, which sounds awesome in theory, but looks pretty stupid on the red carpet.

Kristen Stewart in Guishem at the Scream 2010 Awards

Can it be? Do I see what I think I see? IS KRISTEN STEWART SMILING?

She sort of is! This is a miracle! And her hair looks totally normally, which is even more rare than a smile from this crazy bitch. The dress is gorgeous, the shoes are killer, and she actually looks gorgeous. Keep it up, girl!

Kristen Stewart in Valentino at the New York screening of Welcome to the Rileys

A step down, but definitely still on the good list. The makeup is a little too heavy for her features. She doesn’t have a face that wears makeup well; the more you pile on, the worse she tends to look. And the smile is gone – she’s back to her usual “Did someone just fart?” face. The hair just looks sloppy and unwashed, but the dress is very beautiful. It has that goth angel look that Kristen Stewart can really nail.

Freida Pinto in Alexander McQueen at the London Film Festival premiere of Miral

Perfection. Cool hair, flawless makeup, and a truly fabulous little dress. I love that the purse, the dress, and the shoes are all black with a hint of gold bling. (Well, perhaps a bit more than a hint.) And best of all, she looks so at home in this, like she’s more comfortable in bejeweled McQueen than in her pajamas.

 

Freida Pinto in Marchesa at the Abu Dhabi International Film Festival premiere of Miral

 

Absolutely stunning. My only complaint is that the fabric hangs in a funny way around her ankles. But the bejeweled bustier is phenomenal and the draped skirt is nearly impeccable. And while most starlets would make this look costumey, Ms. Pinto once again looks quite at home in her fabulous digs.

 

Lady Gaga in London

Because everybody needs a dose of what-the-fuckery from Gaga. She might look like the love child of Taylor Momsen and a Sesame Street character, but the effect is still rather fabulous.

 

Kat Dennings in Calvin Klein at Elle's Women in Hollywood Tribute in Beverly Hills

I am a huge Kat Dennings fan (not only is she one of the only legitimately funny actresses in film, she’s also Jewish and supremely cool), and I think she looks pretty hot here. The dress doesn’t seem to be laying right, as it’s all wrinkled around her tummy, but that’s not cutting down on the gorgeous factor. It’s great for her figure, professional but stylish, and the heavy makeup works for her. Love the pointy Mary Janes too, of course.

Kiernan Shipka at Elle's Women in Hollywood Tribute in Beverly Hills

It’s Sally Draper. How could I not include a picture of Sally Draper? Also, I’d have punched a puppy for that dress when I was a kid. Perfection.

Kate Hudson in Prabal Gurung at Elle's Women in Hollywood Tribute in Beverly Hills

Ugh. That shoulder piece is tacky and the whole dress looks droopy and sad. I think I’d be able to give the dress my blessing if Kate had bothered to brush her hair in the month preceding this event. There is no excuse for someone that rich to have four inches of roots showing. Go blonde or go brunette – half and half is not your friend. Although her hair looks so processed and destroyed, it may not be able to afford another round of highlights before it just ups and walks away.

Keira Knightley in Nina Ricci at the London premiere of Let Me Go

Keira once again knocks it out of the park, continuing to prance around in fabulous little dresses like it’s her job. (Oh wait, it is. Lucky bitch.) The shoes are mega-awesome, the blazer is obviously to die for, and the dress? Quaint and sweet and utterly fabulous.

Christina Hendricks in Dolce & Gabbana at the Mad Men season 4 finale party in New York City

Ugh, Joanie. Large floral prints stretched over your fabulous figure? That’s just a disgrace to what a bombshell you are. And those bangs are all wrong for you. Those are the wrong shoes, and you’re seriously lacking in bling. Seriously, Team Hendricks, why is no one on their game? Do I have to do everything myself?

Anne Hathaway in Miu Miu for Vogue

Anne Hathaway referencing Audrey Hepburn – it’s simply perfect. An icon of new Hollywood dressed as an icon of old Hollywood, it’s glamour at its most pure. I love contemplative pose and expression. This is why it can be great to have a real actress in these photo shoots – they can convey a depth that many models just can’t.

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© Democracy Diva, 2010.

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Glee Goes Lolita: GQ’s Controversial Photo Shoot (NSFW) (Updated)

*Updated Thursday morning with quotes from the Parents Television Council, GQ‘s editor-in-chief, and Dianna Agron herself!

As you may know, I have a history of complaining about Glee cover stories. But a picture’s worth a thousand words, which is more of the article than I can read without a GQ subscription, so let’s see what GQ’s controversial photo shoot tells us about Glee, and by extension, the universe.

From the little I read of the article, it’s completely unrelated to the photos. They report Glee as it is: lots of nice kids who work hard, joke around, and don’t fuck up, even as they hurtle at breakneck speed into fame. So why do the photographs look like they were confiscated from a raid on How to Catch a Predator?

Ask Terry Richardson, the photographer of this shoot who faced serious allegations of sexual harassment from many of his former clients and employees merely six months ago. Some industry insiders write him off as a “big personality,” but many models have come forward accusing him of coercing them into sexual acts . Model-filmmaker Rie Rasmussen said that he “takes girls who are young, manipulates them to take their clothes off and takes pictures of them they will be ashamed of. They are too afraid to say no.” He claims he’s artistically documenting his own sexual exploits, but others say he finds models willing to do nude photo shoots and pressures them to take pictures of him naked and allow themselves to be photographed performing sexual acts on him. Yes, dear readers, this was the photographer they thought was appropriate for the Glee photo shoot. I just want that creepy image in your mind while you look at these even creepier images. Let’s start the show.

The Cover

Dianna Agron in a Betsey Johnson bra & cardigan and A.P.C. skirt; Cory Monteith in a Gant Rugger rugby shirt and Gant by Michael Bastian pants; Lea Michele in Victoria’s Secret bra & panties, Relwen sweater, Falke socks and Michael Kors heels

A man with a barely-clothed woman on each arm, and a hand on each scantily-clad ass, just the way God intended it. For God’s sake, this is GQ, not Maxim. Did Lea Michele really need to be pantsless? And what’s with her blow job lips? There’s something about that open-mouthed, wet-lipped porno mouth that is totally nauseating. Dianna looks like a nun in comparison, but she’s still showing a helluva lot of skin. But are they Dianna, Corey, and Lea, or are they Quinn, Finn, and Rachel? The schoolgirl outfits for the ladies and varsity jock wear for the man point to the latter.

They continue the good clean fun in this shot, in which I can focus on nothing but how ashamed I am of the the strongly negative reaction I had to Lea Michele’s nose. (I believe I screamed, “WE’RE JEWISH WOMEN! WE DON’T PHOTOGRAPH IN PROFILE!” But honestly, as Fanny Bryce would say, she’s an “American beauty rose with an American beauty NOSE!”) But the blow job lips are ever-present. Cory looks post-coital, Lea looks mid-coital, and Dianna is fucking Terry Richardson with her eyes (I hope only with her eyes). But at least everyone is basically clothed!

Dianna Agron in a vintage cardigan, Victoria’s Secret bra, Spicy Girl shorts; Cory Monteith in a Dolce & Gabbana sweater, Gant by Michael Bastian shirt, Band of Outsiders tie, Club Monaco pants, Timex watch and Smart Turnout watch strap; Lea Michele in a Michael Kors cardigan, Betsey Johnson bra, American Apparel shirt and Falke socks

Finn is in three shirts, a tie, and pants, while the girls wear glorified panties. And again, it’s the girls surrounding him, focusing their bodies and attention on him, while he gropes them and smiles dopily for the camera. (Not blaming Cory for that, though.)

Dianna Agron in a Brooks Brothers cardigan and skirt, Victoria’s Secret bra, Antipast socks and Yves Saint Laurent shoes; Lea Michele in a Rag & Bone blazer, Betsey Johnson bra, American Apparel socks and Miu Miu shoes; Cory Monteith in a Gap hoodie, J.Crew shirt, Fred Perry tie, Gant by Michael Bastian pants

I can’t even get offended by this picture because it’s such a terrible photograph. Dianna and Lea look like pre-op trannies and Cory seems to STILL BE WEARING LAYERS! And now that we’re in what is undoubtedly a high school setting, I’m becoming more uncomfortable with how Lolita this is getting.

Dianna Agron in a Lacoste shirt, Betsey Johnson bra, American Apparel skirt, Miu Miu socks and Christian Louboutin shoes; Lea Michele in a vintage Melet Mercantile tee, American Apparel panties, Hue socks and Christian Louboutin shoes

Lea: Ohmigod, Dianna! There are books here! Let’s take our clothes off and throw them around and jump in the air, because that’s what schoolgirls do!

Dianna: Okay, Lea! I’ll bend over and get ready for some penetration!

Lea Michele in a vintage Melet Mercantile tee, Victoria’s Secret bra, Calvin Klein panties and American Apparel socks

Why is she wearing a baseball tee and athletic socks? I mean, she’s not athletic. She’s in the show choir. Also, why wouldn’t she be wearing pants at her locker? That seems kind of unreasonable. And… um… does she know that’s a lollipop? Because something in her expression makes me feel like that is way more than a lollipop. Ugh. I’m getting the heebie-jeebies.

Seriously, Terry? A Lolita-ed up high school choir priss, holding a lollipop, playing with her hair, wearing little boys’ sports clothes, lingerie, and Barbie heels, and showing you her twat? That’s really original. I don’t think anyone’s every wanted to fuck a schoolgirl before.

Again, my issue here is: I don’t like the blending of underage characters with overtly sexual photo shoots. If Terry photographed Lea, Cory, and Dianna in the nude, I’d be fine with that if they weren’t in character. They’re all in their twenties and mature adults. But keeping them in McKinley High, so that we have to think of them as sixteen-year-olds when we look at them naked? Is that really necessary?

Cory Monteith in an Armani jacket, Calvin Klein shirt, Uniqlo tie and Diesel jeans

Look! Cory is STILL FULLY CLOTHED IN MULTIPLE LAYERS. And he’s the only one who looks awesome in what he’s wearing, because, you know, he gets to wear clothes. That tie is pretty cute.

Cory Monteith in a Gucci coat, Gant Rugger sweater, and Diesel jeans

He’s still fully clothed! And that coat is stunning. Cory’s the only one who gets to wear anything interesting (because he’s the only one who gets to wear anything at all).

Dianna Agron in a Michael Kors sweater, Victoria’s Secret bra, D&G skirt and Christian Louboutin heels

Ah, the sexy cheerleader: inspiring slutty trick-or-treaters for decades. But I don’t know what’s more distracting – the fact that I can see her fallopian tubes from here, or the giant red pennant pointing right into her ass. Do we really need a “look at my twat” shot from Lea AND Dianna? I’d think one would be enough.

They kept Dianna consistently more clothed than Lea, even though Quinn is supposed to be the sexy one and Rachel is the virginal priss. Dianna’s certainly not covered up, but she’s also not tearing off her clothes or silently offering you a blow job through the camera. At least she looks strong and empowered in some of these shots, whereas Lea only looks like a child prostitute.

And the white socks? In every shot? You don’t have to drive home the schoolgirl point any harder, Terry. We get it.

So? Did you take offense to any of this? This Diva does not blush at a little nudity (or a lot), but the objectification of women and especially the pornification of young girls is something she strongly opposes. This is not about loving or hating Glee. This is about why these girls – and only the GIRLS – to dress like jailbait and rip their clothes off. The stark contrast between Finn and the girls proves that this isn’t about objectifying Glee, or the subjects of your photography in general. When you put two naked schoolgirls on the arms of a fully-clothed man for an entire photo shoot, you’re making a statement. A statement that we should probably look for your name on our local Sexual Offender Registry. Or at least a statement about the role of women: In this shoot, we’re mere objects to be dolled up and stripped down for your viewing pleasure.

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Update 1: The Parents Television Council’s statement, and GQ‘s response to the controversy

The Parents Television Council released the following statement regarding this photo shoot:

“It is disturbing that GQ, which is explicitly written for adult men, is sexualizing the actresses who play high school-aged characters on ‘Glee’ in this way. It borders on pedophilia. By authorizing this kind of near-pornographic display, the creators of the program have established their intentions on the show’s direction. And it isn’t good for families.”

And Jim Nelson, editor-in-chief of GQ, responded with the following:

“The Parents Television Council must not be watching much TV these days and should learn to divide reality from fantasy. As often happens in Hollywood, these ‘kids’ are in their twenties. Cory Montieth’s almost 30! I think they’re old enough to do what they want.”

Really, Jim? Is it us, the readers, who are too stupid to “divide reality from fantasy” and understand that these are 20-something actors? Are you actually going to entirely ignore the fact that these women are photographed in undoubtedly high school settings and dressed as pornified school girls? Dianna is holding a (very phallic) prop that says WMHS, which is of course William McKinley High School, the name of the school they attend on Glee. I’m not sure we’re the ones with the problem, GQ. I think it may be you who has the inability to separate reality from fantasy. And even if you can’t make a pseudo-pedophilic argument about these photos, aren’t they still offensive from a feminist perspective? No one cares that Cory’s almost 30 – because he’s the only one who gets to wear clothes. If dressing up 20-something women as slutty fantasy version of their high school characters in a high school setting isn’t offensive based on the ages of their characters, it’s still offensive that GQ can’t come up with a better concept for a photo shoot than schoolgirl sluts draped around a jock.

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Update 2: Dianna Agron’s response on her personal blog

Thanks to my dear friend Cecile, who both introduced me to this photo shoot AND provided me the link to Dianna’s response.

“I’d like to start by saying that these are solely my thoughts on the November issue of GQ and the controversy that has surrounded its release. I am not a representative of the three of us, the show, or Fox, only myself… For GQ, they asked us to play very heightened versions of our school characters. A ‘Hit Me Baby One More Time’ version. At the time, it wasn’t my favorite idea, but I did not walk away. I must say, I am trying to live my life with a sharpie marker approach. You can’t erase the strokes you’ve made, but each step is much bolder and more deliberate. I’m moving forward from this one, and after today, putting it to rest. I am only myself, I can only be me. These aren’t photos I am going to frame and put on my desk, but hey, nor are any of the photos I take for magazines. Those are all characters we’ve played for this crazy job, one that I love and am so fortunate to have, each and every day. If you asked me for my dream photo shoot, I’d be in a treehouse, in a wild costume, war-paint and I’d be playing with my pet dragon. Until then…”

I only took excerpts from her full statement, but I think this is a very mature response. She encourages parents to keep their children away from these and similarly risque photos, and admits that she didn’t love the idea, but she stayed, and just wants to put it behind her. But I’m not sure how GQ can continue to claim “they’re 20-somethings! They’re not their high school characters!” when the magazine actually instructed Dianna and Lea to play “very heightened version of [their] school characters.” So, which is it, GQ? Are they “heightened” (read: pornified, objectified, over-sexualized) versions of Quinn Fabray and Rachel Berry? Or are they independent twenty-something women who just happened to be dressed as schoolgirls and just happened to be frolicking around a high school with the same name as the school their characters attend?

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© Democracy Diva, 2010.

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Emmys 2010 Red Carpet

Grab your leopard-print snuggie and a bottle of wine, bitches, ’cause this could take awhile.

Mad Women

 

I’ve been trying for days to like this dress, and I just can’t. It just looks like melted-down solo cups. The texture is horrible, and those cones on her boobs are absurd. That blue might be one of the best colors I’ve ever seen on the red carpet, particularly with January’s coloring, but even that can’t save this hot disaster. And that hair? If you want to have sex in the limo on the way to the Emmys, more power to you. But that does not give you license to have sex hair on the red carpet. Your all-American beauty looks will only take you so far, January. They may get you an Emmy nomination, but you won’t get this Diva’s approval until you learn how to dress.

 

 

My sister Haley brought up an intriguing question to me today: Does Christina Hendricks have an unusually small head? Or, as I posited, is it merely that any head would look tiny atop those giant hooters? Just something to think about. Regardless of the answer, Hendricks is rocking this dress. Totally unusual color, and it complements her hair beautifully. Redheads always rock green and purple outfits, and Miss Joan is no exception. Loving how this dress cinches her waist, shows off her ta-tas without looking vulgar, and then gets all soft and billowy and feathery at the bottom. I think there’s a little too much length at the bottom, but it’s a small complaint. And the sleeves are to die for.

Elisabeth Moss in Donna Karan

Beautiful, simple, and classic, just like Elisabeth Moss herself. The draping is incredible, the color makes her glow, the shoulder piece adds a little intrigue, and I even like the train (and I hate trains). The bling is AMAZING – those bracelets are seriously opulent – and nothing’s better than that sassy little smile.

 

Kiernan Shipka in Papo d’Anjo

You can take your Bettys and Joans and Peggys, but Sally Draper is the real deal. That dress is precious, the hair is awesome, and my ten-year-old self would have killed for those little tiny high heels. Also, her name is Kiernan Shipka, which is awesome.

Modern Ladies

 

It’d be fine without the awkward stripe down the middle. It’s a perfect cut and color for her, but I wish it had some more intrigue and complexity other than the stripe, which is just not particularly beautiful. But the hair is amazing.

This just has too much going on. Less is more, people, and those ruffles over her boobs are just masking Julie’s beauty. This bitch doesn’t age, and has the hair and skin of a freakin’ newborn, but I look at this photo and I only see fabric, not the fabulous woman underneath it.

This is incredibly mature (but not aging) for someone as young as Sarah Hyland, who plays Claire and Phil’s oldest daughter on Modern Family. And she is rocking the hell out of this dress. The fabric is so luxe, it looks like liquid. It also makes her look about six feet tall and totally stacked. The braided/twisted straps are a dream, and the hair is perfect. I hope she doesn’t end up doing crack in five years.

 

 

 

And our favorite middle child is also nailing something chic beyond her years. I could do without the Bat Mitzvah hair and the embroidery on the bodice, but I’m loving the black-on-blue skirt and the funky, stylistic draping.

Glitter Queens

 

Easily the best dressed of the night, Claire Danes proves that simplicity is the name of the game. This dress is phenomenal and it fits her like a glove. I love that the color is just a sparkling version of her own skin tone. I may prefer her with bottled-red hair and flannel shirts, but I will always love Angela Chase.

Jennifer Carpenter in Oday Shakar

Stunning.

Gleeks Gone Glam

 

Hello, gorgeous! This was my other favorite gown of the night. Not every designer can take a 5’2″ girl and make her look statuesque, but of course Oscar can! The color is amazing, the gown is divalicious, her jewelry is awesome (I bet we’re going to see knockoffs of that necklace EVERYWHERE), and this bitch knows how to POSE. The hair could have been a little more formal, but that’s my only complaint.

 

 

Jayma’s beautiful, but this dress is Lea’s dress’s less hot little sister. The jewelry is tacky and her hair is a mess.

 

 

The cutest little queer on two legs. LOVING the treble clef pin on his lapel!

Work it out, Quinn! Black and pink lace together is one of my favorite things on the planet, especially in formal wear. Gorgeous dress with perfect hair and makeup to boot. But she does look a little sad, especially for a ridiculously hot girl on a hit Emmy-nominated TV show. Maybe she’s sad because she’s secretly in love with Matt Morrison, who is over her right shoulder, staring at her shoes instead of her ass. He’s a closet case, honey. Move on.

 

Brittany pulled out all the stops, rocking some serious old-school Hollywood glam. Very impressive for such a red carpet newbie! The makeup artist was a little heavy-handed, but the hair is flawless.

If you took Cha Cha DiGregorio from Grease and added a Lady Gaga wig, you’d get this photo. Seriously, Naya, we all like to play dress-up, but this is your first Emmy red carpet. Is this how you really want to be remembered? In a slutty 80s prom dress, boring shoes, and a hairstyle so stupid even Rihanna hates it?

Funny and Fabulous

 

Holy couture! Kathy Griffin’s body has never looked better, and it takes a confident bitch to rock Oscar with that much certainty. Get it, girl.

Amy Poehler gave birth THREE WEEKS AGO and already looks this good. We should all be so lucky. The color is gorgeous, her tits look amazing, and she’s allegedly wearing half a million dollars worth of Stephen Russell jewelry, though I can’t really see much of it.

Tina Fey in Oscar de la Renta

I could do without the hieroglyphic print, but for a woman who never looks comfortable in a dress, Tina is posing the hell out of this Oscar gown. It’s incredibly flattering to her figure, and it’s much funkier and fancier than she usually goes. It’s curve-hugging but not tight, and the hair and makeup are looking beautiful. Kudos to Ms. Fey for taking a fashion risk and finally having it pay off.

Funny and Feh

Mindy Kaling in Aguri Sagimori

I think Elvira wore this to her high school prom. The shoes are cute, but that hair is much funnier than this season of The Office and this haphazardly-draped crinoline disaster is no better. And a petite girl should know better than to wear a dress with such wacky proportions that ends in the middle of the calf. Unless you’re a supermodel, that’s going to make you look stumpy.

Kristen Wiig

Awful print, stupid belt, poorly fit, and stupid shoulder ruffles. Plus I don’t like the hair or makeup, and the purse is too busy. Fire your stylist, Kristen.

New Diva on the Block Award

 

Last I checked, Nina Dobrev was just another teen mom on Degrassi, and then she was just another teen vampire on Vampire Diaries, and then suddenly she was KILLING IT on the red carpet and performing in the epic Emmys opening number alongside the Glee cast, Tina Fey, Jon Hamm, Betty White, and the rest of TV’s elite. I can’t even believe how stunning she looks. The dress is borderline bridal, but it’s exquisite. The draping at the top is actually breathtaking. The hair is classy and glamorous, and those earrings were the perfect choice. Keep it up, Nina! Looking forward to seeing what else you’ve got.

 

Hottest Couple

Neil Patrick Harris (in Calvin Klein) and David Burtka

NPH’s suit is beyond chic. It seems men fall into two categories: basic boring suit/tux, or trying and failing to spice it up. Neil Patrick Harris, of course, is classy and stylish enough to pull off a funky suit and just look even more dashing. And David looks adorable, as always.

Worst Dressed

 

Oh, lord. A potato sack on top, a magician’s slutty assistant on the bottom, fugly shoes, and way too much jewelry. And that hair? Unless you’re in bed with a pint of Ben & Jerrys, that mess is inexcusable.

 

 

 

Nope. No. Just… no. Your puke-colored, flowered and rhinestoned dress should not have love handle cutouts.

What part of wearing a purple hairy tiered gown appealed to Emily? Because I think she needs to seek mental help.

Stephanie Pratt in Marciano

Sometimes I forget my pants in the limo too, Steph. It happens.

Lo Bosworth in Karen Caldwell

Lo Bosworth thought she was dressing like Mad Men here. She didn’t get the memo that a dress that looks amazing on a 1960s secretary in an office does not necessarily look awesome on a 2010 red carpet. She looks like she’s off to a business lunch, not an awards show. And that skirt should be about four inches shorter. The shoes don’t go, she’s wearing a stupidly large number of rings, and the hair is so bad, it’s almost funny.

Kate Gosselin in Carmen Marc Valvo

For the love of God, just go be with your children and leave us all alone.

Anna Paquin in Alexander McQueen

I love a girl who’s loyal to a designer, especially McQueen, but there’s a time and a place, and this ain’t it. The armored top looks insane, and the skirt is totally wrong. Way too many bracelets, and no hair style to speak of.

Heidi Klum in Marchesa

We get it, Heidi. You like short dresses. But you’re also not 18 and while I’d never tell a woman who looks as good as you that she needs to cover up, this shtick is getting a little tired. It’s not that you’re too old to wear dresses that show your cooter – it’s that your vagina must be tired of all the attention, because we’re tired of seeing her. And is your hair in a flip? The same style that all the boys in my middle school were rocking circa 2001? Because it didn’t work on them, and it sure as hell doesn’t work on you.

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Later this week: Your weekly fashion recap (cover all things non-Emmys, from red carpet to editorials and more) and of course, your weekly Project Runway recap! Follow @democracydiva on twitter for updates.

 

 

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