The Challenge: Whoever says “Yoplait frozen yogurt” the most wins! In teams of two, make strangers eat yogurt and tell you how it tastes so that you can pick three ridiculous words to “inspire” you. Oh, and go to a carnival at Coney Island and “win” prizes to use as the unconventional materials. (Or just get them free, because there’s no way all of them won a dozen giant stuffed animals each in thirty minutes.) Basically, watching this episode was like watching a 90 minute Yoplait commercial that slowly descended into a terrifying documentary about mental illness.
Guest Judge: Kelly Osbourne. She was fine, but I’m more qualified for her job on Fashion Police than she is, so I can’t be more complimentary than that. (Come on, dear readers. You know me and Joan Rivers would get along FAMOUSLY.)
ALEXANDER POPE, Bottom 4
JUSTIN LEBLANC, Bottom 4
This suffered from a severe case of WAY too much going on. It’s pretty bad, but I’ll always prefer something over-designed to something under-designed, so for me, it wasn’t the worst look on the runway. I think both Alexander and Justin have strong aesthetics and some definite potential, but they seriously need to EDIT.
ALEXANDRIA VON BROMSSEN, Top 4
DOM STREATER, Top 4
Totally surprising, quirky, incredibly modern, and unexpected. This had so much charm and personality and weirdness, and the styling was absolutely KILLER. But of course, the judges reward drama over talent, so Kate and Helen’s look had to take the win over Dom and Alexandria’s, even though the latter was far superior.
This was actually cool, and nicely constructed, but it wasn’t as innovative or surprising as some of the other looks.
HELEN CASTILLO, Winner
KATE PANKOKE, Top 4
I know Kelly Osbourne thought that making a dress out of hats was “fucking brilliant,” (side note: EVERYONE STOP CURSING AROUND TIM GUNN.) but this just didn’t impress me that much. Yes, it was a great concept, and the shape of the skirt is really interesting, but the bodice has nothing going for it. Unlike Dom and Alexandria’s look, it wasn’t an interesting or memorable design, it was just rendered in an unconventional way (which, duh, it’s the unconventional challenge). Dom & Al managed to make something that was fashion-forward in and of itself, not just because of the materials involved.
This was sexy, surprising, and ultimately really well-executed, because you can barely tell that that vest and top aren’t made of normal fabric. The top half of the look has nothing to do with the bottom, though, so the judges were right to leave this in the safe pile.
MIRANDA LEVY, Bottom 4
TIMOTHY WESTBROOK, Eliminated
Miranda and Timothy both basically had nervous breakdowns during this episode, and they brought all their baggage and tears to the runway with them. Timothy spent half the episode clutching a giant stuffed unicorn and talking about them as if they’re real, because, you know, people will do LITERALLY ANYTHING for screen time. Oh, and he sobbed reading a note from his model about how talented he is (I beg to differ) – it was almost as staged as last week’s moment with Tim handing Helen tissues during her mid-runway-show breakdown. Everything about these two, including their dress, was awkward, stilted, and unpleasant to watch. The only good thing about it is we’ll never have to hear that stupid child squeal about unicorns and fake sustainability ever again.
I won’t waste my breath elaborating on a creature as awful as Sandro. He proved himself to be a misogynist lunatic during this episode; I’ve written him off completely. And this dress looks exactly like what it is – a bunch of plastic with some straw wrapped around it.
Judges’ Top 4: Helen, Kate, Alexandria, Dom
Diva’s Top 4: Dom, Alexandria, Helen, Kate
Judges’ Bottom 4: Alexander, Justin, Miranda, Timothy
Diva’s Bottom 4: Alexander, Justin, Miranda, Timothy