Boring was the theme of this particular red carpet event, but that won’t stop this Diva from giving you fascinatingly bitchy commentary! Without further ado, the 2011 Golden Globes.
Your slightly delayed (forgive me, as law school kicks my ass) weekly celebrity fashion recap. Check back later tonight for the Golden Globes red carpet post!
The Fashion Professionals
This bitch has “fashion editor” written all over her. She’s a doppelganger to Dianna Agron (Glee‘s Quinn), only twice as fashionable. That skirt is beyond gorgeous and belongs in my closet immediately. Why don’t we all own perfectly fitted pencil skirts in crazy gorgeous prints? And those heels scream Vogue from a mile away. The perfect highlights, and that glance over the shoulder like she owns Manhattan. God bless her.
This is proof of how a few classic but simple items are all you need. A vintage sundress, a skinny belt, brown sandals, and oversized sunglasses – all perfect for a late summer’s day of running around the city. It’s quirky and casual, like a professional blogger should be – you can tell by her laid back appearance that her work day involves a comfy chair, a dog on her lap, and a strong cup of coffee.
And this lady’s outfit says fashion/business all the way. The blouse is gorgeous, very European-looking, but crisp, so you know she’s serious. Those pants are the perfect cranberry color and make this skinny bitch’s legs look about eight miles long. The sunglasses, purse, lipstick and shoes say “I’m fabulous and you better not fuck with me,” but the casual braid says “See how I don’t even have to try hard to look this good?”
And this woman looks like a Parisian socialite – she’d be complete if she were holding a Lanvin shopping bag. The sheer blouse compared to the long, sturdy skirt is a nice mix, and that greyish pink mauve leather is gorgeous. And the little eyelet peep-toe heels? Precious. Not to mention the jewelry, which makes the outfit.
The Fashion Show Attendees
Combat boots? With white sweatsocks? Leighton, are you trying to give me an aneurysm? The dress (or perhaps sweater/skirt combo) is dull as they come, and the metal bracelets taking over both her wrists give off a Wonder Woman vibe, and not in a good way. And what’s with the lack of hairstyle and makeup? This is New York Fashion Week. You’re going to have to try a hell of a lot harder than that.
Attention, universe: Jenna Ushkowitz is clearly in desperate need of a stylist. That awful color, the oversized top, the whole peasant vibe it gives off, and that dreaded headband – this girl needs to be saved.
Portia, who cut your bangs? Actually, let me put that more accurately: How fucking drunk was the blind mental patient who cut your bangs? Seriously, Portia is ordinarily a beautiful woman and here she looks like a seven-year-old boy.
The hair looks as if she just barely escaped and wind tunnel, and the dress looks more like my grandmother’s droopy old apron than anything that should be in the same room as Diane Von Furstenberg.
The Fashion Party-Goers
Way to turn up the heat, B! Leighton redeems herself in one of my favorite looks from Marc Jacobs’s Resort 2011 collection. The dress is breathtaking on her, the purse is completely badass, and I think the white shoes were a bold and wise choice. And see the difference it makes when her hair and makeup are done? Poof, instant starlet.
Our very own Rory Gilmore was all over the Fashion Week scene. I’m liking the lighter hair color, and though the dress is pretty overdone, it’s cute enough. Particularly for someone who doesn’t dress particularly well. The pumps and clutch were an obvious choice, as was the matchy-matchy gold bracelet, but who can say no to those blue eyes?
Outside New York
Alexa Chung takes over London in this fabulous little yellow number. Perfect cut and fit, a bright and fun print, and freaking adorable grey booties.
Holy hell. Now this is a dress. The sleeves, the neck line, the colors, the fit, the draping of the skirt, the impeccable details – Cate truly looks like royalty in this gown. Her porcelain skin and boyish haircut just add another element of high fashion to an already fantastic look.
Too big on top, too short on bottom, too long in the sleeves, tacky colors, and a vomit-inducing print. Yup, this is about as many mistakes as you can make at once on the red carpet.
Oh, jeez. What is it, Carey, your bat mitzvah? What post-adolescent woman would be caught dead in something so Tinker Bell? It’s just incredibly immature. Even the cut of the dress looks more appropriate for a little girl than a woman. And the shoes only make matters worse. Glinda the Good Witch would look at this and go, “Whoa, girl. Chill out on the sparkles.”
I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Blake Lively was the best dressed of the week, in my humble opinion. I am literally drooling over this blood red Chanel dress, which shines like it was laquered. And although it brings to mind awkward images of flowers sprouting from Serena’s nether regions, I think the red flowers are absolutely breathtaking. It looks so meticulously made, and it fits Blake like a second skin. The matching shoes are intense, but I think they make a strong statement. Her cocktail rings are what truly complete this look, especially the one that matches the dress. And with her red lipstick and effortlessly sexy blonde hair, Blake looks damn near perfect here.
I’m reviewing all the collections from New York Fashion Week, so keep checking back for updates! And follow me on twitter @democracydiva.
Glee Dos and Don’ts
Glee‘s resident “Asian” (not to be confused with “Other Asian”) finally looks chic, mature, and utterly fabulous on the red (well, technically blue) carpet. Nude dresses are all the rage, and the interwoven print of those two different fabrics is subtle but gorgeous. I’d have done a lighter shoe (the dress is so pale, plus it’s the middle of the summer) but this is definitely a hit. And her makeup looks absolutely beautiful. She’s glowing.
Kudos to Santana for stepping outside the box. It feels like at every red carpet event, young Hollywood tends to wear the same short, tight, sparkly dress over and over again. Just seeing a different silhouette is refreshing. I’m not in love with the pattern (it matches my bedding perfectly, but I’m not sure it’s great on a dress) but it fits her well. I love the length and the way the skirt flares out. I do wish she’d worn a little bling, but she chose the right shoes, and her hair and makeup are natural-looking and perfect. She’s an incredibly beautiful woman, and with a little coaching (and the right gays) she could become a real fashionista.
Everybody’s favorite dumb blonde is a beautiful girl who consistently looks terrible on the red carpet. This poor girl has no idea what works for her and what doesn’t. First of all, her hair always looks stupid. I don’t understand why she can’t be content to just show off the natural beauty of her gorgeous blonde hair. And her makeup always ages her about ten years. On Glee, Brittany looks fresh-faced and youthful, but this sort of looks like she used ten pounds of makeup to try to achieve a “natural” look. And the outfit is clearly a disaster. Is it an ugly dress, or is it a mismatched top and skirt? The patterns are too much, the proportions are way off, and the fit is terrible. And I’m not sure whether or not I support those shoes. I’m wary of them, to say the least.
But zoom in on that big chunky cuff bracelet, with the exposed zippers and the gold and silver safety pins. That bracelet is gorgeous, and huge, badass bracelets are uber-trendy right now, from the Chanel runway shows to the street. So I am holding out hope for you, Heather, because I know you have potential.
I think this is a great dress for Jayma. It says “I may not be a teen, and I may play a teacher, but I’ve got style and a teensy waist and am overall adorable.” Seriously, her tiny little figure is too cute, and the dress is perfect for her. All Jayma needs is some help with accessories. The belt only distracts from the beauty of the dress, and I don’t like those shoes with it at all. And girlfriend needs some bling. But the dress is supremely cute and the hair and makeup are perfection. Keep it up, Emma!
First of all, let’s say what needs to be said: Lea is looking a little thin lately. She used to be normal-woman thin, but now she’s Hollywood thin, and although she looks incredible, I think there is cause for concern. Lea, do not lose another pound, especially if you’re going to be flying back and forth between LA and New York every day to film Glee and perform in the Funny Girl revival. You’re way too classy to become one of those scary-thin, coked-out, over-extended Hollywood starlets. You’re a nice Jewish girl from Jersey – please don’t turn into Lindsay Lohan.
All public service announcements aside, Lea Michele is once again KILLING IT on the red carpet. This dress is mega-sexy, but not inappropriate for a teen event. Her legs are astounding, the Christian Dior shoes were a stroke of genius, and her hair has never looked better. That natural windblown beach hair look is great for her. She could have eased up on the makeup a touch, but that’s a minor complaint. Say what you will about this diva, but bitch knows how to dress like a winner.
Gomez Gone Wild
The little white dress, like the little nude dress, has taken over the red carpet recently. And Gomez rocks the look, particularly because of those fabulous, 1970s sleeves. The hair is effortlessly beautiful, and the makeup is fresh and natural with heavy eyes, which I love. The shoes aren’t for me, but the black nail polish is badass against the white dress. (Remember: black nail polish is okay on the red carpet; it’s dark toe nail polish that makes starlets look like they’re growing fungi.)
But once you see the back, the look goes from fabulously 70s to Studio 54 cage dancer. I’m not saying I hate it, but there’s something a little trashy about all that silver running down her back. But I do commend her for steering away from the shiny, tight, short dresses or red cocktail dresses that she and Taylor Swift basically live in at most events. It’s always good to try something new, even if from the back she looks like a Cher video.
Oof. This is a disaster for quite a few reasons. That lime green color is terrible on Emma’s ghostly white skin. I’m pale as can be, but even I know that porcelain-skinned girls need to stick to certain colors or get a tan before appearing on the red carpet. Her skin looks grey, the shoes are too much, and the bag is ugly. But what the hell is happening with her makeup? Who on earth told her that brown shadow UNDERNEATH her eyes was a good idea? The grey skin with the brown bags under her eyes makes her look like she belongs in a hospital, not on a red carpet.
Best Reason to Not Loathe Twilight (But I Still Do)
Simple silhouette with a unique and beautiful print – always a solid choice. Ashley brought out all the stops in this fabulous little Valentino number. The peep-toe pumps are perfect, the purse is cute, and I’m loving the ring on her left hand. And the hair and makeup are flawless. She’s a stunning girl who made all the right choices, and that’s simply unstoppable on the red carpet.
© Democracy Diva, 2010.
Glee Does Comic-Con
Heather (Brittany): I’m not loving those bangs; I think her signature Cheerios high ponytail is much more flattering. The outfit is cute enough, if a bit amateurish.
Kevin (Artie): This boy can sing, dance, act, and DRESS. I wish other young actors took the risks that Kevin takes with his wardrobe. The shirt is stunning, the suspenders are adorable, and he looks unique and chic, if a bit over-dressed for Comic-Con. I’m loving it.
Naya (Santana): Can’t go wrong in a cute floral sundress. Effortless and adorable.
Amber (Mercedes): Cute top and sweater, but it’d look a thousand times better without that belt.
Chris (Kurt): He’s a self-professed comic book geek, so I’m glad he’s showing his roots at this event. But I think he could have paired this outfit with something a little more fashion-forward, since he usually dresses incredibly well.
Jenna (Tina): Adorable dress, great hair. And the nude shoes trend is super-hot right now, so kudos for catching on.
Love the Girl, Hate the Dress
Like the Democracy Diva, Anna Kendrick loves her some Marchesa. (The starlet donned Marchesa at the 2010 Golden Globes, at the Eclipse LA premiere, at the Up in the Air Toronto premiere, and more.) Unlike the Diva, Ms. Kendrick doesn’t seem to understand that some Marchesa dresses work far better on the runway than they do on the red carpet. This is one of them.
The lopsided bust, which I’m sure would work fabulously on a 6 foot tall, size zero model, is just unfortunate on Kendrick’s petite frame. The black beading against the blue print isn’t particularly attractive, nor are the proportions of the dress, which make Anna look short and squat instead of long and lean. And those shoes? What drag queen told my girl Fritzy to wear those shoes – especially with that dress? A rookie mistake. And once again, I’d like to remind young Hollywood: If your hair is up and your dress is low-cut, WEAR A NECKLACE. I’m disappointed by her lack of bling. But I do love Anna Kendrick, and I hope she bounces back from this fashion mishap quickly.
The Best and Worst of Biel
I’ve never thought Jessica was as beautiful as most people seem to think she is. Don’t get me wrong, she’s a hottie for sure, but she’s got awfully harsh features and she lacks the poise needed to pull off high fashion gowns. But I’m eating my words from the neck down, because I think she looks incredible here, at the London premiere of The A-Team. I normally don’t support sheer gowns on the red carpet, but I can forgive it because this particular gown is just stunning. It fits her remarkably well, making her waist look tinier and her boobs look bigger – and she had a great figure to begin with! I would’ve done black shoes instead of red, but they’re still a good choice. And let’s hear it for a girl who isn’t afraid to bring out the bling. Loving those bracelets.
Now, the hair is a hot mess. How many times do I have to say this – you can’t go all-out with the dress and skimp on the hair and make-up! That frizzy bedhead is not appropriate for such a beautiful gown. But I still give her props for a remarkable effort.
Well, she’s back to looking stiff and uncomfortable on the red carpet, which is a huge step down. Not that she looked particularly cosy in the Valli gown, but there’s something very cold and unnatural about her in this Versace gown. The gown itself is beautiful, but I just don’t think she’s wearing it well. I think it’s a bit too ornate and vintage-looking for her tastes – she’s very sportswear, Americana, bold colors and simplicity. This gown is anything but. And those shoes were a horrible choice. Whoever invented the teardrop-shaped eyelet peeptoe should obviously be shot. And the silver shoe with the blue dress is very mother-of-the-bride. I’d love to see this dress on Anne Hathaway or another starlet with more traditional, glitzy tastes (and the poise to pull them off), but something about this gown on Jessica just isn’t working for me.
It’s a shame, because she looks so much more at ease here, but she’s wearing a glorified potato sack. That sleeve is simply dreadful – unless your arm is in a sling, there’s really no need for that much fabric on the sleeve. And the dress itself is shapeless and dull, like a poorly-made toga. Those shoes look navy, and even if they’re black, they’re clearly not the right black for that dress. And I hate the way the fabric gathers around her waist – it’s unflattering and downright sloppy. Definitely the worst out of the three.
Now headlining in Vegas: Fergie, the alien warrior princess turned stripper! Oh, Fergie, you can wear whatever the fuck you want, just please stop making music.
Also, it is just me, or does her head seem unnaturally large? Seriously, she looks like a Bratz doll.
Delhi Couture Week 2010
Congrats to Delhi on hosting their first ever couture fashion week! I encourage you to check out Tom & Lorenzo for more pics from the runway show; everything is so beautiful and so different from Western fashion.
This couture gown by Manav Gagwani is simply magnificent. I love that you can feel the Indian influence, but you can also see that the designer was inspired by Italian and French couture as well. Every single fabric used is breathtaking. The glitz and glamour of the shiny, glittering fabrics and lace is almost overwhelming. I love the different colors used – iced periwinkles and lilacs, lavenders and silvers. Everything about this gown screams couture. I look forward to many more Delhi Couture Weeks in the future!
The Rapidly Aging Cameron
I ask because I care: Cameron, what the fuck is happening with your face? This is clearly a bad Botox job or worse – the skin is pulled awfully tight in some places, while other spots appear swollen and puffy. That can’t be intentional, and it doesn’t seem natural, either. But if you’re going to let your face fall to pieces, at least sport a fabulous outfit to detract from your train-wrecked skin. This sad lump of fabric is not doing you any favors. It has no shape, making you look unfortunately bulbous. Sure, you’ve got killer legs, but this outfit hides your bust, waist, and hips, like you’re just a misshapen potato on two legs. Fire your plastic surgeon and your stylist immediately. You might be 37, but you’ve got the potential to look 30, and right now you’re leaning towards 50.
God Bless America
Business chic all the way for Ms. Ferrera! The dress is adorable and professional, flattering and youthful. Though I do need to give her my lecture on NO DARK TOE-NAIL POLISH ON THE RED CARPET. Ugh. The make-up artist was a little heavy-handed, but America looks absolutely radiant, and every professional woman should own a dress like this. Also, that hair is hella sexy.
Oh, Serena. I know your career goals are to bare as much of your tits as possible on every red carpet, but you have broken the two Golden Rules of Public Titty-Baring:
1. Thou shalt not show any part of the nipple. (This includes even the slightest bit of mysterious skin that seems areola-esque.)
2. Thou shalt not neglect the rest of the outfit just because the titties are bared.
That top is so naked, it looks like it must be on backwards. And those pants? Seriously? We’re wearing high-waisted, wrinkled baggy pants now? Because I simply refuse to support that. And what’s with the shoes? The pants cover up the top ankle strap – that’s clearly not a good sign. And the belt was just a mistake. Aren’t belts supposed to like, wrap around you? Not just poke out awkwardly? Though I guess you can use it as a weapon to fight any comic book geeks who can’t stop staring at your almost nipple. Oh, and brush your hair, for God’s sake. And lose the eight different kinds of bracelets, you look like a tween after a shopping spree at Claire’s.
Hello, Peggy! This is by far the best Ms. Moss has ever looked. She donned this glitzy and glamorous dress for the premiere screening of Mad Men‘s season four in Times Square. The hair is absolutely amazing – thank god we’re saying fairwell to Miss Olson’s signature ponytail! The curly bob is totally chic and works wonders for her features. And the dress! The perfect color, a wonderful fit, and a phenomenal choice for Elisabeth. I love the sassy smile on her face, as if she’s thinking, “Bitches, the days of Peggy the ugly ducking are OVER! This is Elisabeth Moss, glamour queen! Bow down!” I’m looking forward to seeing more like this from the adorable Ms. Moss.