You’ve seen the hottest looks from the runway; now it’s time to judge the celebs who attended Paris Fashion Week’s Fall 2011 couture collections.
DAPHNE GUINNESS in Alexander McQueen
I’m just picturing her screaming, “WHERE IS MY RAINBOW KIMONO? WHERE IS MY HARNESS HAT?” while some poor assistant weeps in the corner. I know there’s a lot to take in, but I think I’m most offended by those sleeves. Good lord.
ANNA DELLO RUSSO in Roberto Cavalli
Anna is the editor-at-large for Japanese Vogue (think of her as a way friendlier Anna Wintour, but with a better sense of humor), so she’s allowed to show up at Paris Fashion Week in a wedding dress, black eyelet veil, and rose bush on her head. She’s WORKING that gown.
DITA VON TEESE in Alexis Mabille
I love the cascading flowers and the shoulders, but this is one over-designed dress. I know it’s a couture show, but there’s just a few too many tricks happening all over this dress. The result is kind of distracting.
ANNE HATHAWAY in Valentino
The dress is beautiful and fits her fabulously, but that makeup is just so severe compared to the ethereal hair and makeup. I do love the flowers in her hair.
Fierce. A fascinator, an epic purse, a newspaper, and one raised eyebrow is really all you need to get through Paris Fashion Week.
DIANE KRUGER at the Chanel show
I really want to like it, but it’s just not working for me. I usually love a pop of print on the inside of a skirt, but it works better with a color, or at least a more beautiful print than this one. And the skirt ends in such a strange place, and points up to her cleavage in such a weird way. And girlfriend wears those strappy sandals at like every event – invest in a new pair, darling.
I wish I were the heir to the Guinness beer fortune so that I could run around in increasingly ridiculous ensembles. And those shoes, please.
DAPHNE GUINNESS at the Armani Privé show
Surprisingly low-key for Daphne, who was apparently at every single event that Paris Fashion Week offerred. That corseted part looks a wee bit rib-cracking, and that keyhole doesn’t exactly show the most beautiful part of Ms. Guinness’s body.
OLIVIA PALERMO in Valentino
I mean, I feel bad for the peacock that had to die to make her purse, but I think she looks pretty great. Simple silhouette, perfect fit, fabulous necklace.
ANNA WINTOUR at the Armani Privé show
It’s not fashion week until Anna Wintour steps out of her limo. Love the dress, love the blazer, not crazy about them together, but that’s sort of Anna’s shtick. Fabulous necklace, but it’s too much with the patterned clothes. And she’s another lady who can afford every shoe on the planet, but wears the same pair to every event.
CATE BLANCHETT at the Armani Privé show
Yes, the matchy-matchiness is overwhelming, but she is killing it with her Cate fierceness, and I want to steal those earrings.
ANNA DELLO RUSSO
This is a little gaudy, a little Jersey Shore for my taste. Every individual piece is beautiful, but together, with the gold belt, shoes, cuffs, necklace, and those shoes, it’s too much.
OLIVIA PALERMO at the Valentino show
Cute, if a tad snooze-worthy.
ELLE FANNING at the Chanel show
The dress doesn’t even remotely fit her, and it looks like it was sewn by a Project Runway contestant. But it’s a work of art compared to those shoes, which are actually too ugly to be legal. Seriously, those may be the ugliest shoes I’ve ever seen. And I also saw a blog refer to them as “flatforms” – as in, flat platforms – and that made me hate them even more.
ALEXA CHUNG at the Chanel show
She looks like a bit of an idiot.
ANNA DELLO RUSSO
Anna, darling. You’re a fashionable European woman. Why so J-Woww all of a sudden?
OLIVIA PALERMO at the Armani Privé
Hideous pants. Like, HIDEOUS. It’s a shame, because that blazer is great, but these proportions are just ridiculous.
Olivia, I think a woman of your socioeconomic status should really stop stealing shoes from strippers.
KATIE HOLMES in Armani Privé
Try harder. You’re in Paris, the carpet is red, and the show is couture. Show some respect.
ANNE HATHAWAY at the Valentino show
This diaper-under-a-sheer-skirt trend needs to DIE. And Anne? Throw out all your lipstick. Every shade. Clearly, your lipstick dependency has started to affect your life.
MILLA JOVOVICH at the Chanel show
She’s kidding, right? She’s not really wearing an undershirt over a black bikini top to the Chanel couture show in Paris, is she?
AMANDA PEET at the Valentino show
This is probably the ugliest color I’ve ever seen. The dress doesn’t come close to fitting her, the color is nauseating and washes her out terribly, and she paired it with an identically