Your workweek deserves a healthy dose of competition.
NATALIE PORTMAN vs. EMILIA CLARKE
Natalie: Hello, Khaleesi.
Emilia: *nods* Amidala.
Natalie: So, who do you think –
Natalie: What? I didn’t even ask my question!
Emilia: Doesn’t matter. The answer is ME.
Natalie: I was GOING to say, who –
Emilia: do I think would win in a queen vs. queen fight? Me.
Natalie: Okay, but who –
Emilia: do I think would win in a similarly high-stakes but slightly less fatal fashion face-off? Me. Time to turn in your crown, sweetheart.
NAOMI WATTS vs. EMMY ROSSUM
Naomi: Hi, Emmy, sorry I’m late. I just saw Queen Amidala punch Daenerys Targaryen in the face, so I got a little distracted.
Emmy: Well, sure. Who wouldn’t?
Naomi: It’s despicable, isn’t it? Those ladies taking this little game so seriously.
Emmy: I wholeheartedly agree.
Naomi: It’s such a shame everyone can’t be as honorable as we are.
Emmy: Too true, Naomi. Too true.
Naomi: I mean, fighting? With their fists? I never.
Emmy: Nor I.
Naomi: Everyone knows that a true woman only fights her fashion battles with lance and sword. Not her HANDS.
Emmy: Oh. Um. I gotta go.
CARA DELEVINGNE vs. EDDIE REDMAYNE
Cara: Hey, cheekbones.
Eddie: Hello again, Cara.
Cara: So, have you ditched that wife of yours for me yet?
Eddie: What? No! Never! And also, aren’t you gay?
Cara: Sexuality is a spectrum, Eddie. Read a book. Or see one of your movies.
Eddie: Well – I – are you aware that you’re rather intimidating?
Cara: It’s just the eyebrows. You’ll get used to it. Can I borrow that polka-dotted tuxedo jacket?
Eddie: Er – you –
Cara: Oh, cool your tits, Eddie. I’m just messing with you. You make an incredibly easy target.
Eddie: Thank you?
LUPITA NYONG’O vs. CHARLIZE THERON
Lupita: Well, let’s get this over with. I’ve got places to be, and people to stun with my captivating beauty.
Charlize: Careful, Lupita. Rush through this, and you’ll find yourself at the business end of one of my stilletos.
Lupita: Oh, that’s very funny. What are you even doing now, other than Dior ads?
Charlize: Um… ever heard of a little movie called Mad Max: Fury Road?
Lupita: Oh, shit! That was you? I straight up did not recognize you in a ball gown.
Charlize: And what about you, Lupita? What has kept you so busy that you’re willing to rush through our little fashion battle?
Lupita: Um. Are you serious? I’m literally standing in front of the words STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS.
Charlize: I saw that movie, and I definitely did not see you anywhere in it.
Lupita: I WAS SO IN IT. God, my parents said the same thing. You can be in a movie even if your actual face isn’t in it! People do it in animated movies all the time!
Charlize: Alright, alright. Calm down. You were in it. And I narrated March of the Penguins.