The Challenge: The designers get a tour of the Marie Claire fashion closet and are tasked with creating a look inspired by a pair of shoes. Tim Gunn gave them a fashion quiz to determine who picks first, which was actually sort of fun, and gave the more pretentious designers reasons to pat themselves on the back for their knowledge of fashion history while mocking their less-informed peers.
Guest Judges: Kaley Cuoco, who has no business telling anyone anything about fashion when she has never appeared on a red carpet looking anything but lost, and Anne Fulenwider, editor-in-chief of Marie Claire.
Surprisingly excellent. Clearly the winner of the tartan pants competition (Miranda’s pants were made of almost the same fabric), though is that a splitting seam I see over the model’s buttcrack? I hope not. Anyway, Alexander usually struggles with toning down his looks enough so that actually human beings could consider wearing them, but he proved with this challenge that he can make modern, fashionable, wearable clothes. I’d wear that top in a heartbeat.
ALEXANDRIA VAN BROMSSEN
The clear winner, as far as I was concerned. The boots are so insane, they’re borderline hideous, but if anyone can pull them off, it’s this model. I loved the simplicity of this dress – particularly important when the shoes are this attention-grabbing – and the sort of ethereal, wispy vibe it brought to the majorly S&M shoes. As the judges said, that hard-and-soft combination worked brilliantly. Alexandria’s styling skills are probably the best of any of the contestants, and I’m looking forward to seeing what else she’s got up her fabulous little sleeves.
Awful. The rouching effect on the top looks quite ugly, and there’s nothing interesting about that satin poodle skirt. I didn’t want to see Bradon go home, because his earlier work proves he’s got a lot of talent and potential, but this was truly terrible.
I really wanted to like this, because I think Dom’s use of quilting was creative and cool, but the result is bulky, ill-fitting, and kind of tacky. I don’t think it was a great idea to match all of the colors in the shoes exactly – it comes off as very clownish and not remotely wearable.
So Helen made the world’s most basic LBD and a shrug to go over it, and we had to act like she was Coco Chanel herself, inventing the damn little black dress. I could not understand the extraordinary praise this very, VERY simple garment received. Don’t get me wrong – it’s clearly very wearable, and by far the best thing Helen has made on this show. But are we just going to ignore the fact that there’s not a modicum of innovation or creativity in here? This exact outfit has walked down the Calvin Klein runways approximately eight hundred times. If the judges are expecting me to act like Helen created something that we haven’t all seen a million times before, I’m going to need them to share their crack pipes with me.
Forgettable. The skirt’s got nothing going on, and the sweater looks like toilet paper.
Good silhouette and fit; great shrug. But Justin’s work is still too boring to keep him on the show much longer. I know he wanted to tone down the outfit and show off the shoes, but there were still more interesting ways to do that.
Terrible, but there were so many disasters on the runway that this was able to sneak by unnoticed. That seems to happen to Karen a lot, actually.
This is hideous. I don’t even know what I’m looking at. And when the challenge is based around the shoes, don’t you think we should actually be able to see the shoes on the runway?
Another wildly overpraised, very basic black dress. I haven’t seen Ken create anything that doesn’t look like an 80s prom dress, and this is no exception.
It was certainly Miranda’s turn to go home. Though Kate and Bradon made much uglier garments, Miranda has yet to churn out anything but awkward, repetitive silhouettes, so I had no problem with her auf-ing. I do agree with her feelings that not all fashion has to be “cool,” and there’s a huge market for nerdier clothes. In fact, it became obvious that the judges have no other words to describe fashion, as they used the word “cool” approximately eight hundred thousand times during the episode. Grab a thesaurus, judges, because I can’t stand listening to grown adults who are supposed to be fashion experts judge every single garment in terms of “cool” or “not cool.” Overall, this was a pretty boring episode. I don’t need more drama, but a more interesting challenge would have helped.
Judges’ Top 3: Helen, Ken, Alexandria
Diva’s Top 3: Alexandria, Alexander, Helen
Judges’ Bottom 3: Jeremy, Bradon, Miranda
Diva’s Bottom 3: Bradon, Kate, Miranda