March Fabness 2017, Round 2: Chanel & Gucci Brackets

Round 2 begins NOW. 

JANELLE MONAE vs. VIOLA DAVIS

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Janelle in Bally; Viola in Brandon Maxwell

Janelle: Shame, isn’t it? You and I meeting in the second round?

Viola: See this statue I’m holding?

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Janelle in Dsquared2; Viola in Cinq á Sept

Janelle: Uh, yes?

Viola: It means I don’t have to give a shit about silly little contests anymore.

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Janelle in Chanel; Viola in Michael Kors

Janelle: Silly little contest? March Fabness is a time-honored, NOBLE tradition of –

Viola: No, you misunderstand. March Fabness is flawless, obviously.

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Janelle in Chanel; Viola in Christian Siriano

Janelle: Whew. You had me nervous for a minute there.

Viola: My point is, once you have an Oscar, literally everything else on earth becomes a silly little game, no matter how vital and brilliant a celebrity fashion bracket it is.

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Janelle in Alexandre Vauthier; Viola in Armani Privé

Janelle: I understand.

Viola: No, you don’t. But you will. Someday.

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Janelle in Elie Saab; Viola in Vivienne Westwood

Janelle: Really, Viola? You think I’ll win an Oscar?!

Viola: No, but it was fun to watch you get all excited!

DAKOTA FANNING vs. HAILEE STEINFELD

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Dakota in Dolce & Gabbana; Hailee in Elie Saab

Dakota: What are you supposed to be? Disco Barbie?

Hailee: Weren’t you in Twilight?

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Dakota in Monique Lhuillier; Hailee in Valentino

Dakota: Um… no!

Hailee: No, I’m like definitely a thousand percent sure you were in Twilight. Like, more than once.

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Dakota in Elie Saab; Hailee in Reem Acra

Dakota: I was NOT! I WAS, however, in New Moon.

Hailee: There ya go.

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Dakota in Giamba; Hailee in Jason Wu

Dakota: And Eclipse.

Hailee: Yup.

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Dakota in Valentino; Hailee in Ralph & Russo

Dakota: And Breaking Dawn Part 2.

Hailee: Yeah, that sounds about right.

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Dakota in Gucci; Hailee in Vera Wang

Dakota: Now that that’s settled, what was your point?

Hailee: My point is that you were in Twilight. And thus you never get to judge anyone else’s choices, ever again.

ZACHARY QUINTO vs. THANDIE NEWTON

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Thandie in Altuzarra

Zachary: Hm? What was that? Are you talking to me? I’m just walking around, beautifully, with beautiful dogs, in beautiful pants, being beautiful.

Thandie: Uh… I didn’t say anything.

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Zachary: How did I get this perfect wave in my hair, you ask? Two words: unicorn blood.

Thandie: First of all, I didn’t ask, and second, ew. And also, WHAT?!

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Zachary in Hugo Boss; Thandie in Erdem

Zachary: Did you know that turtles also have necks?

Thandie: … Seriously, buddy. Are you okay?

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Thandie in Schiaparelli

Zachary: Why yes, Thandie, my beard IS resplendent!

Thandie: You’re definitely not okay.

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Thandie in Schiaparelli

Zachary: And yes, I AM planning on single-handedly bringing back the waistcoat!

Thandie: Good to know.

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Thandie in Schiaparelli

Zachary: I’m sorry. Sometimes, a man can become so handsome and well-dressed, he simply loses his mind.

Thandie: You are absolutely insufferable, do you know that?

KATE BOSWORTH vs. DIANE KRUGER

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Kate in Monse; Diane in Mugler

Kate: Diane.

Diane: Yes, Kate?

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Kate in Givenchy/Miu Miu; Diane in Miu Miu

Kate: Well, I thought I had a shot at this damn competition, but now that’s over.

Diane: Why?

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Kate in Jil Sander; Diane in Versace

Kate: Uh, because you’re here?

Diane: No, why did you think you had a shot at winning this in the first place?

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Kate in Dior; Diane in Cushnie et Ochs

Kate: Wow. You really didn’t come to play, did you?

Diane: Not even slightly.

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Kate in Dolce & Gabbana; Diane in Prabal Gurung

Kate: So what am I supposed to do? Just give up?

Diane: No! That would take all the fun out of destroying you.

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Kate in J. Mendel; Diane in Naeem Khan

Kate: Fine. If we’re doing this, I’m wearing my body weight in diamonds.

Diane: Bring it.

Don’t miss a single goddamn poll. Catch up here: Prada/Versace Brackets • Valentino/Givenchy Brackets • Dior/McQueen Brackets


© Democracy Diva, 2017.
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