Welcome to Cannes, bitches!

The annual amfAR (the Foundation for AIDS Research) Gala was held in Cannes this week, because celebrities were already schlepping their couture to the south of France for the film festival. So why not raise some money for a good cause? Let’s check out the red carpet…

ALESSANDRA AMBROSIO

The color is glorious and the dress itself is simple but lovely.
BAR REFAELI

This Israeli goddess has really blown me away this week. She never stops looking like a supermodel.
BROOKE SHIELDS
in Marchesa

Brooke, darling. This is all kinds of sad. What in God’s name did you do to your hair? And who told you this hideous dress could possibly flatter your figure? Stay away from trashy bridal gowns, Brooke.

CLEMENCE POESY
in Chanel
Holy French ferocity. Fleur looks FANTASTIC.

COURTNEY LOVE
in Givenchy

Touche, Courtney. She may look like . . . well, like she was married to Kurt Cobain, but at least she can still throw on a hell of a dress.
FAN BING BING
in Louis Vuitton

Y’all, Fan Bing Bing is like my new favorite person alive. After a few too many seasons of celebrities in nude dresses, one fantabulous Chinese chica is wearing every damn color of the rainbow, and that’s Bing Bing. The dress is too small on top and too big on the bottom, but that’s such a phenomenal color for her.

FREIDA PINTO
in Lanvin
The colors are stunning, but the cut isn’t working. The bagginess/puffiness of the top is strangely juxtaposed with those sleeves that tighten at the elbow. It just doesn’t make any sense.

GEORGINA CHAPMAN
When you run Marchesa, I guess you get the pick of the litter when it comes to your best gowns. The top is too ice dancer for me, but that is one helluva skirt.
GWEN STEFANI
in L.A.M.B.
This dress is actually stunning. It’s exactly what a past-her-prime-but-still-relevant pop star should wear. But you know what I’m going to say about that hair and makeup – Gwen is the Mayor of Trannyville, USA.

JANET JACKSON
in Haider Ackermann

It’s a little too mature for Janet, but she’s off-setting it well with that hilarious face. She looks so happy, I can’t even judge her. The colors are gorgeous and she’s having a blast – what else matters?
KAROLINA KURKOVA
in Chanel
Is her bracelet attached to her dress? Doesn’t that seem dangerous?

KIRSTEN DUNST
in Chanel

If the dress had one layer of skirt instead of two, and that layer stopped a few inches above the knee, Kirsten would look amazing. But that under-skirt is just killing me.
MILLA JOVOVICH
in Versace

She looks like a Desperate Housewife.
MISCHA BARTON
And she looks desperate for work.

NAOMI CAMPBELL
in Givenchy
This one is desperate for attention…
ROSARIO DAWSON
in Roberto Cavalli
… but this one, finally, looks pretty fab. Not my taste, but the ivory is a nice contrast to her olive skin, and that necklace is fierce.
UMA THURMAN
in Chanel
Love the rose neckline, but that elastic-looking waistband is beyond ugly. Fire your gays, Uma. NOW!

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© Democracy Diva, 2011.

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