Cannes 2017: The Parties, Part 1

Cannes parties: like Cannes premieres, but drunker! 

RIHANNA at the Rihanna x Chopard party
gown by Ralph & Russo, jewelry by Chopard

Photo: Pascal Le Segretain/Getty

Romantic, enchanting, and fucking dripping with diamonds. Go on, Riri.

RIHANNA at the Chopard Space party
gown by Adam Selman, jewelry by Chopard

Photo: AFP

I’m like 90% sure this is a Cinderella costume Rihanna ordered off Amazon Prime. And honestly, I’m not mad at it.

JULIANNE MOORE at an after-party

Photo: PeopleStyleWatch

Effortless glam. Good lord, do I want this dress.

JULIANNE MOORE at the Chopard Space party
gown by Alexander McQueen

Photo: Pascal Le Segretain/Getty

Thank you for pulling out the big guns even at the parties, Julianne. Fashion bloggers around the world thank you for the velvet and that plunging neckline and your general wonderfulness.

JULIANNE MOORE at the Rihanna x Chopard party
gown by Sonia Rykiel, earrings by Chopard

Photo: Pascal Le Segretain/Getty

I… do not like this at all. That purposefully-disheveled skirt just looks like she got stuck in a vacuum cleaner.

PAZ VEGA at the Fashion for Relief event

Photo: Antony Jones/Getty

I am here for this, full stop.

PAZ VEGA at the Chopard Space party
jumpsuit by Elie Saab

Photo: Pascal Le Segretain/Getty

Paz, goddammit, I WAS ON YOUR SIDE. Don’t betray me like this.

SARA SAMPAIO at the Chopard Space party
gown by Elie Saab

Photo: PeopleStyleWatch

Sara is one of those models who pokes her head out once awhile to tell us that it’s six more weeks until Fashion Week. Come out and play more often, Sara. Your lipstick game is on point. The gown is pretty, but could have been boring with a nude lip. But she brought it to life with that vampire lipstick.

ISABELI FONTANA at the Chopard Space party
jumpsuit by Elie Saab

Photo: PeopleStyleWatch

Elie Saab looks tend to get ubiquitous at Cannes, so shoutout to Isabeli for finding something that sticks out from the pack of elegant dresses. This jumpsuit is a fuckin’ blast.

CARA DELEVINGNE at the Magnum x Moschino party
gown by Moschino

Photo: Andreas Rentz/Getty

I love Cara Delevingne’s bald head. If anything, it makes her eyebrows look even more stupidly amazing than before. It also adds a serious punk rock factor to everything she’s wearing, which is lucky, because this dress is pretty basic.

WINNIE HARLOW at the Rihanna x Chopard party
gown by Roberto Cavalli

Photo: Pascal Le Segretain/Getty

I’m no Cavalli fan, but Winnie’s bringing as much A-game to Cannes as a non-A-lister can. She has the attitude to pull off the dangerous combo of cut-outs and animal print, and I actually dig that sleeve.

WINNIE HARLOW at the Chopard Space party
gown by Zuhair Murad

Photo: PeopleStyleWatch

To quote William Shakespeare*, “but I thought the old lady dropped it in the ocean at the end!”

*It could be Shakespeare, or it could be Britney. What’s the difference, really?

ARIZONA MUSE at the Chopard Space party
gown by Elie Saab

Photo: Pascal Le Segretain/Getty

She needs to give more of a fuck about the styling if she’s going to wear a dress this intricately beautiful. Love the color, though.

NAOMI CAMPBELL at the Fashion for Relief event
gown by Atelier Versace

Photo: PeopleStyleWatch

Respect for a woman who still tries, even though she no longer needs to. (Kate Moss, you could learn a lesson here.)

ADRIANA LIMA at the Chopard Space party
gown by Reem Acra

Photo: Pascal Le Segretain/Getty

I don’t totally hate this, but she looks like a Vegas nun.

PETRA NÊMCOVÁ at the Chopard Space party
gown by Elie Saab

Photo: PeopleStyleWatch

The braids are ridiculous and the lipstick isn’t much better, but I could love this dress in another context.

BELLA HADID at the Fashion for Relief event
gown by Roberto Cavalli

Photo: Antony Jones/Getty

Yes, I’m exhausted with sheer gowns, like anyone else who has been following the red carpet for the last few years. But if you’re going to go sheer, could you wear underwear that’s less… I don’t know… clinical-looking? Something about those panties scream “medically-issued.” If she turned around and it said PROPERTY OF MOUNT SINAI HOSPITAL on her ass, I wouldn’t be surprised.

BELLA HADID at the Chopard Space party
gown by Roberto Cavalli, shoes by Rene Caovilla

Photo: Pascal Le Segretain/Getty

Girl, you are resting on pretty. And on diamonds. This dress is doing nothing for anybody.

ARAYA A. HARGATE at the Chopard Space party
gown by Ashi Studio

Photo: Pascal Le Segretain/Getty

Seen it; over it.

ISABELLE HUPPERT at the Chopard Space party
gown by Stella McCartney

Photo: PeopleStyleWatch

Now we’re just wearing normal bras under sheer ball gowns? Am I being Punk’D? Why is this happening?

EVA LONGORIA at the Global Gift Gala

Photo: PeopleStyleWatch

If you told me she was naked and standing behind a fancy shower curtain display at Restoration Hardware, I wouldn’t blink an eye.

HEIDI KLUM at the Fashion for Relief event

Photo: Antony Jones/Getty

Count me out of the babydoll dress revival.

KENDALL JENNER at the Chopard Space party
gown by Ralph & Russo

Photo: Antonio de Moraes Barrios Filho/FilmMagic

I actually like this look, but I had to put Kendall at the bottom of the post because of the torment she inflicted upon us at a different event:

KENDALL JENNER at the Fashion for Relief event
top by Alexandre Vauthier, shoes by Sergio Rossi

Photo: PeopleStyleWatch

Oh, go fuck yourself.

Need more Cannes? Don’t miss a lewk.


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Respond to Cannes 2017: The Parties, Part 1

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