In honor of the worst casting decision of the 21st century, I have enlisted the help of my dear friend and fellow bitchy blogger Sweeney (of Sweeney Says and Snark Squad fame) to tackle the unabashed atrocity that is Lifetime’s Liz & Dick. In case you dared to wonder what makes us qualified for such a campy, ridiculous job: we’ve been judging trannies together since we faked orgasms at auditions for The Rocky Horror Picture Show, which we co-directed together not too many years ago. We are nothing if not experienced at yelling filthy things at shitty movies.

Sweeney: If this movie weren’t doomed to be forgotten as soon as we all stop laughing at it, I’d suggest we invent call lines and rally some people to drunkenly watch it in tacky costumes and gaudy makeup. It would be equally as appropriate.

Diva: Starring Lindsay Lohan as a pale imitation of Elizabeth Taylor, this movie should not be viewed sober. We highly recommend The Fug Girls’ Official Liz & Dick Drinking Game.

Let the nightmare begin!