Welcome back, motherfuckers!
Happy Monday, divas! It’s time for your not-so-regularly-scheduled bitchfest.
Sure, Beyonce is preggers and Gaga is a dude, but let’s talk about the most interesting part of the VMAs: the fashion.
Some of our favorite divalicious stars did some fabulous cover stories and photo shoots this month. What do Britney, Adele, and Lea have to show us?
From this side of final exams, readers, you look simply ravishing.
The eve of bitchery is upon us! This Diva is bringing you all the hottest fashion on the red carpet and the big screen, with just a bit of Halloween flavor. I know it’s been well over a week since the last so-called weekly fashion recap, but I’m a busy little future lawyer, so forgive me, dear readers, and enjoy a LOT of fabulous.
Hello, Liz Lemon! The straight hair is a bit severe for Tina’s features, but the dress is pretty fierce and flatters her figure beautifully. Love the dramatic cocktail ring, but I wouldn’t have chosen black tights.
What’s the biggest drama bringing together the worlds of couture and magic? As my fellow nerds are well aware, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part I premieres this month (omfg so excited). So what’s the controversy? There’s Gossip Girl‘s Clemence Poesy in the role that made her not famous, Fleur Delacour, marrying Bill Weasley (the eldest son of our favorite magical red-headed family) in a dress that looks uncannily similar to an Alexander McQueen gown from Fall 2008. Does Team Potter owe an explanation to Team McQueen? I love the idea of a hot witch in high fashion, but Fleur Delacour-Weasley definitely did not get that gown from Madam Malkin’s Robes shop. (Oh, yeah. I know the name of the robes shop in Diagon Alley.)
She wore this to a gala? Perhaps if it were ten years ago and she was running around a stage lip-synching “Waiting for Tonight,” this would be an appropriate costume, but you can’t expect me to believe she wore this as a dress. As eveningwear, no less. Johnny Weir called; he wants his queertastic skating outfit back.
Yes, Selena Gomez, I’m talking to you as well:
Who are you, Katy Perry at a Christmas party? But at least she has the Vegas excuse, where anything goes. She looks downright demure next to some of the get-ups you find in those parts.
Simple and fierce; proof that minimalism can be more fabulous than all the accessories in the world.
And then, a reminder of how ugly minimalism can be. I don’t know what’s worse: the hair, the makeup, the choice of accessories, or the sad, droopy draping on that dress. This looks like Gretchen Jones and Michael Costello teamed up for an eveningwear challenge, and that’s about as big an insult as I can think of.
But Carey mostly made up for it with this look…
But lord, do I hate those shoes. They look like the shoes Drew Barrymore wore to like, ten different events in two weeks, just in a way tackier color. However, the hair has seriously improved. Tom & Lorenzo have blogged about this very problem, in which cute starlets get adorable pixie cuts that look perfect until they start to grow out. And then we all have to endure months of their hair looking like shit. But some extra-hold gel took care of that, and the dress is gorgeous.
No words. Just amazing.
Leighton should know by now that when it comes to hair and makeup, less is more. I think she’s always more beautiful when she doesn’t let the makeup artist go so heavy-handed. I also want to slap the moron who approved those shoes with that dress, and this is also ice skating costume territory (seriously, starlets, what’s going on with that?). But at a minimum, I love the top half of the dress.
What else does Leighton have to say?
BOOM. Fabulous. I remember this Spring 2011 dress well; I had it in my original Red Carpet Predictions post, but couldn’t find the starlet to pair it to. Ms. Meester is rocking this adorable little color-blocked cocktail dress, although the fit around the bust is a little odd. The accessories are simple and chic, and the hair and makeup is still dramatic, but more natural and youthful.
I’m sorry, Ms. Jackson. Are you for real?
Boring, but beautiful. It could use a better hemline, though.
This was Tara Reid’s Halloween costume, though I’m not sure how we’re supposed to differentiate it from Tara Reid on a Tuesday.
On the Finale: Part I of Project Runway Season 8, Heidi criticized Gretchen for a dress with this same strange design element in back, arguing that no woman would wear it. I don’t usually come to Gretchen’s defense, but this is proof that someone wears that. Boom. Lawyered.
It took me days of staring at this picture to figure out why this girl looked so familiar: she played Heath Ledger’s daughter in Brokeback Mountain. Apparently she’s in 127 Hours, which a movie I can’t wait to see even though I’ll probably vomit during it. Anyway, she officially has the right to exist according to this Diva, because this little dress is too cute. The necklace is fierce, the Louboutins are fab, and she’s a gorgeous woman. Keep it up, newbie.
And across the country, but at the same film premiere:
She’s related to, though not the creator of, the Missoni brand, she’s model-gorgeous, and this dress is funky and adorable.
Ooof, Rosario. That hem? Seriously? And that color? And that shoulder? And those shoes? I can’t handle any of it. Please redeem yourself as soon as possible.
Well, she reedemed herself. It’s not perfect, but it’s further proof of the beauty of simplicity. Love the accessories.
Yes, that is Christian Siriano. As that slutty French feather dusty from Beauty and the Beast. One of the best Halloween costumes I’ve ever seen.
I blogged about this dress during Fall 2010 Fashion Week, but I’m not sure I love it as much in the real world as I did on the runway. I think the black tights are too much; they bring it down into a young ballerina place. But otherwise, she looks pretty damn beautiful.
Fabulous, fabulous, fabulous. Definitely one of my favorite random red carpet looks of the past few months.
Simple and sexy as hell. The nude shoe trend on the red carpet might be played out by now, but I absolutely adore the way the shoes match her skin tone – except for the Louboutin red stiletto, which matches the dress. Dramatic, statement-making, but minimalist. I love it.
And in case you were curious, the Project Runway finale poll results were even more pro-Mondo than I anticipated:
An astonishing 96% of you wanted Mondo for the win. Let’s just forget this season ever happened, dear readers.
© Democracy Diva, 2010.