The stars donned their fanciest duds and hit the amfAR Cinema Against AIDS Gala in Cannes. I warn you, their charitable contributions (nearly $11 million was raised for AIDS research!) do not make them immune from vicious judgment.
DIANE KRUGER // dress by Chanel, shoes by Christian Louboutin
Diane has had a truly spectacular week in Cannes, fashion-wise, and she clearly saved up plenty of fierceness for the amfAR Gala. This spectacular dress is a dream on her, and in usual Kruger chicness, it’s styled perfectly. This girl has a true knack for pairing a perfect feminine dress with a killer pair of shoes – the studded Loubs were a great choice. Love the hair, makeup, and those delicious teardrop diamond earrings.
MILLA JOVOVICH // gown by Atelier Versace, shoes by Sergio Rossi
Stunning. Every pop star ever should be furious she didn’t get her hands on this sexy, futuristic stunner of a gown before Milla did. The accessories are a little predictable, but they don’t distract from the glamness of the disco-diva gown.
KAROLINA KURKOVA // gown by Roberto Cavalli
God bless Karolina Kurkova. Who else can you count on but this brilliantly fierce supermodel to wear – and ROCK – a sheer gown with fabulous gold embellishments and a matching metallic blazer? She’s part Egyptian princess, part 1970s cabaret performer, and I love every bit of it.
KIRSTEN DUNST // gown by Louis Vuitton
She’s born to wear all those gorgeous pale shades of blue, isn’t she? The embellished waistband is pretty, if a little child-like, and the striped purse is a lovely surprise. It’s the color and silhouette that make this particularly beautiful, though I wish she’d taken just a few inches off the hemline in the back. That little half-assed train is unnecessary, but the rest is so summertime gala chic.
LIU WEN // dress and purse by Fendi
You might not know her by name, but during the Fall 2012 season alone, Liu Wen walked the runways for Dior, Rodarte, Donna Karan, and more. And as you can clearly see, she’s got plenty of attitude and a funky futuristic flapper style that I’m digging. The feathered purse is a little much, but the different textures of that intricate dress are so beautiful together. The shoes were an excellent choice, and the fresh-faced makeup and slicked-back hair let that incredible dress and Liu’s natural beauty shine.
LINDSEY WIXSON // gown by Giambattista Valli
Ms. Wixson is another fabulous runway model (she’s walked for Diane von Furstenberg, Versace, Peter Som, and more) and also opted for a multi-textured, glittering black look. I love the lace sleeves, and though the dress is kind of Morticia Adams-meets-Cher, I don’t really think that’s a bad thing. At least, not on Lindsey.
DOUTZEN KROES // gown by Versace
It’s good to be a Victoria’s Secret Angel. Doutzen jumped on the Versace train with a perfect mix of modern silhouette and old Hollywood glamour. The hair and accessories are a bit disappointing, but it’s hard to go wrong with a beautiful woman in a lovely dress. Let’s get another view:
DAMN. This gown just went from lovely to delectable with that ultra-low swoop and the buckled straps across her back. Plus, her ass looks so perfect, this dress tells you she models underwear for a living without you even having to ask.
KYLIE MINOGUE // gown by Emilio Pucci
It’s sheer, it’s red, it’s Pucci, it’s Kylie. It’s hard to go wrong with that combination. I’m no Pucci fan, but he’s made for international pop sensations, so Ms. Minogue is the woman for this dramatic gown. Love the sheer sleeves!
BÉRÉNICE BÉJO // gown by Giambattista Valli, purse by Olympia Le-Tan
I always love a woman who steps outside the box, and even though she doesn’t always get it right, I respect Ms. Béjo. It’s an unusual gown, but it’s fantastic on her. A bit long, but mostly it just makes her look incredibly statuesque. The mixed red and white prints look gorgeous, though I wish there were a little less draping over the bodice to make the look a little cleaner. The red boxy Olympia Le-Tan purse is terrific (it’s in the shape of a book, allegedly Jacques Hardy’s La Femme Amoureuse, probably because it’s French and important-sounding). But I must say, the hair and makeup needs a whole lot of work. If you paid someone to make your hair and makeup look like you didn’t even try, fire them. There’s effortless beauty, and then there’s this.
HEIDI KLUM // gown by Marchesa, shoes by Christian Louboutin
I don’t know, dear readers. It’s sort of lovely, but it’s also sort of a lace muumuu that very closely resembles the curtains in my grandmother’s old apartment in Queens. She’s almost pulling it off, whatever it is, just on the nature of her Heidi Klum-ness, but this better not spawn any sort of trend.
NINA DOBREV // gown by Elie Saab, purse by Salvatore Ferragamo, shoes by Jimmy Choo
This was my Spring 2012 red carpet prediction for Dita von Teese, who would have brought her signature old Hollywood glamour to this lovely Elie Saab gown. Nina’s styling is a little more ordinary – strappy silver heels, matching clutch, sparkly drop earrings, and standard hair and makeup. She’s lovely in this, no doubt, but it’s all in the details, and the details aren’t particularly impressive here.
JULIANNA MARGULIES // gown by L’Wren Scott
There’s no excuse for that sloppy hair, and we’ve seen this gown many times before, but it is absolute heaven on her figure. Mega-flattering, romantic, and chic. Just a little underwhelming compared to the fashion-forward antics of her fellow red carpeteers.
PARIS HILTON // gown by Basil Soda
I don’t know why on earth Paris Hilton is still being invited to real events, but aside from the completely unnecessary sheer side panels, this isn’t so terrible. Cheap and tacky-looking for a normal starlet, but relatively tasteful for Paris.
JESSIE J // gown by Louis Heal, purse by Lulu Guinness
Speaking of cheap and tacky, here’s Jessie J, whose leopard printed gown must have gotten into a fight with an actual leopard, since it’s clearly been shredded to pieces. And are slits that go up to the TOP of your ass really a thing now? Because that’s something I refuse to support. And don’t get me started on the absurdity of heavy black boots with a gown at a gala in the south of France in May, dear readers. I may have a conniption.
JANET JACKSON // gown by Emilio Pucci
That’s a whole lot more of Janet’s inner boob than I want to see, and this dress fits her miserably. But I do love the heel-less shoes that she’s daring to wear, even if I’m highly concerned that she’s about to topple over.
ROSE MCGOWAN // gown by Atelier Versace
It’s bubblegum pink, it’s at least a size too small, and her matching lipstick is absolutely killing me. This is Cannes, motherfuckers. Show some respect and dress the part!
KIM KARDASHIAN // gown by Elie Saab
Like Christina Aguilera before her, Kim Kardashian has officially morphed into the drag queen impersonator doppelganger of Kim Kardashian. It seems the ass-high slits are indeed a trend – Kim has two, and has her tits out, in true Kardashian fashion. The makeup is making me question whether my vision is blurring or she really did apply her makeup with a magic marker. The styling is very aging trophy wife, which I guess makes sense for Kim.
KATE UPTON // gown by Louis Vuitton
There’s so much wrong here, I almost feel bad for the poor girl. I don’t even know where she came up with that Miss Teen Alabama pageant runner-up hairdo, because it’s about as far from Cannes fashion as I can possibly imagine. That heavy monster of a dress weighs down her tits, obscures her waist, widens her hips, and makes her look like she’s carrying a few hundred pounds of fabric on her legs. It’s miserable unflattering, down to the shiny black peep-toe pumps. Stylists of the world: save this poor girl from whoever is currently guiding her down the path to fuglytown.