Finals are over, dear readers – it’s motherfucking FASHION time.

DIANE KRUGER in Los Angeles
top and skirt by Rochas, purse and shoes by Chanel

I’m not a fan of the straight hair with the center part, but LORD do I love the rest of this outfit. The crop top with a collar, cuffed sleeves, and white buttons? It’s ridiculously adorable, as is the poofy skirt with the crisp white belt and printed purse (snakeskin? metallic? who cares!). And the shoes are stupendously fantastic.

DIANE KRUGER in New York City
gown by Prabal Gurung, purse by Charlotte Olympia, shoes by Brian Atwood

The statuesque beauty can do no wrong, dear readers. The ruffles and sheerness would be too girly if it weren’t for the thick white straps and fabulous belt, which bring a whole new layer of fabulous into the mix. Her hair is shining like a sunbeam on acid, and the domino clutch is such a fun piece.

DITA VON TEESE in London
dress by Valentino, shoes by Christian Louboutin

Dita sticks to her vintage aesthetic, but this look is more updated and sassy than her usual mega-sexy gowns. I love the black embellishments at the skirt and sleeves, the way the belt cinches her itsy-bitsy waist, the gorgeous purse, the sexy shoes, and the perfectly 1940s film star hair and makeup.

ISABELLE FUHRMAN in Hollywood
jacket, top, and shorts by Prabal Gurung

There are starting to be too many 15-year-old fashionistas to keep track of, but Isabelle Fuhrman played the knife-wielding Clove in The Hunger Games, so DO NOT FUCK WITH HER. Also, I am fully obsessed with her fantastic Prabal Gurung ensemble. The sleeves and jacket are a tad long, but she’s fifteen and not probably quite famous enough to have a team of tailors customizing her wardrobe, so that’s forgiven. I love the black accents on the sleeves, lapel, and pocket; the cyan-accented blouse underneath is perfect. And I almost never enjoy peep-toed black booties on the red carpet, but they totally work with this menswear-meets-technicolor ensemble.

MIRANDA KERR in New York City
jacket, top, and shorts by Helmut Lang, purse by Gucci, shoes by Tabitha Simmons

Yes, bitches! Fabulous shorts-suits for EVERYONE! Seriously, this is a trend I could never get tired of – sharply tailored jackets in incredible prints and colors, with matching shorts and a crisp blouse underneath? Too fierce, dear readers.

JESSICA CHASTAIN in New York City
dress by Preen, shoes by Christian Louboutin

The dress might be a skosh too long, but I love the overlapping roses, the colors, and the way the shoes exactly match one of the more subtle colors in the dress. Pink or white shoes would have been too matchy-matchy and childlike, but that shade of nude is just perfect. And the matching lipstick is a little kitschy, and maybe doesn’t work so well with her fantastic hair, but you’ve got to give a ginger props for daring to wear all these shades of pink and still looking great.

MICHELLE and BARACK OBAMA in Washington, DC
gown by Michael Kors

This was my Resort 2013 red carpet prediction for Jessica Alba, but I’m loving it on the fabulous First Lady. She’s always incredible in gold, and the embellished part at the top is fun and interesting. Plus, the earrings are to die for.

TINA FEY in Washington, DC
gown by Naeem Khan

Well, look at Ms. Tina Fey! It’s rare that she wears anything but black, and even when she does, she still tends towards much darker and less attention-grabbing colors than this. Well, kiss those days proudly goodbye, Liz Lemon, because you are a golden goddess in this lacy Naeem Khan stunner. It’s a touch too long, but I can see the beautiful detailing on the hemline, so I totally understand why she didn’t want to cut that off. Now, grab a pair of earrings next time, and you’ll be perfect from head to toe.

KERRY WASHINGTON in Los Angeles
dress and shoes by Gucci

Gorgeous hair, gorgeous dress, gorgeous shoes, gorgeous woman. It’s hard to go wrong when you follow that formula, dear readers.

ZOE SALDANA in Hollywood
dress, purse, and shoes by Lanvin, jewelry by Melinda Maria and Dana Rebecca

I’m still underwhelmed by Zoe’s recent red carpet looks, and this dress, from the dirty-dishwater color to the slightly burlap sack-ish shape, is no exception. But the straps and waistband are super-flattering, it’s easy to wear, and the shoes and purse are gorgeous pieces that sort of clash, but kind of in a fun way.

TAYLOR SWIFT in New York City
dress by Oscar de la Renta, purse by Lauren Merkin, shoes by Jimmy Choo

Yes, Taylor. You’re a pretty, pretty, princess. WILL YOU PLEASE WEAR SOME CHIC LADYPANTS NOW?!

AMY ADAMS in Hollywood
gown by Jenny Packham

I’m underwhelmed. The fit is a total mess, it looks like she’s wearing two different dresses layered on top of each other, and there’s not much styling of any kind happening. You can’t exactly make Amy Adams look ugly, but you can make her look kind of boring.

RASHIDA JONES in Hollywood
jacket and pants by Celine, top by Peter Pilotto, purse by Jimmy Choo, shoes by Giuseppe Zanotti

Damn those cropped pants and the completely out-of-touch pink heels – this could have been a great look without those two incredibly awkward elements. Also, a button or two undone would have served her much better. Between the very saturated blue and the myriad of prints happening on that blouse, keeping it buttoned all the way up is just too much.

KATE HUDSON in New York City
top and pants by 3.1 Phillip Lim, shoes by Casadei

I have already professed my love for printed lady-suits, but I draw the line at a lady-suit made of PAJAMAS, for God’s sake.

SARAH JESSICA PARKER in New York City
vintage dress by Alexandra New York, purse by Fendi, shoes by Jean-Michel Cazabat

Why, SJP? Why on earth, when you have an infinite number of purses and shoes to choose from, would you choose those two? Together? With that dress? I am forced to believe she got dressed in a pitch-black room, because I just cannot comprehend why she would have made any of these styling choices.

LEA MICHELE in Hollywood
gown by Valentino, purse by Fendi, earrings by Irene Neuwirth

Sternum. Thighs. What the fuck else is new.

KATY PERRY in New York City
dress, belt, and shoes by Oscar de la Renta

The hair is awful, the dress is tacky, the shoes look cheap, and is she freaking kidding me, with the red belt on the pink dress? Or is that a trick of the light?

DIANNA AGRON in New York City
dress and headband by Dolce & Gabbana, shoes by Christian Louboutin

This is not a dress – this is a handsewn costume for a 1920s theme party. The shoes are so overly complicated, the purse is too big, and the wreath of flowers in her hair? Embarrassing.

KEIRA KNIGHTLEY on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon
dress by Duro Olowu, shoes by Bottega Veneta

 I want to like this, Keira; really, I do. I like to consider myself an open-minded person. But you look like a cartoon kindergarten teacher who makes murals out of garbage in her spare time.

KRISTEN STEWART in Hollywood
gown by Talbot Runhof, shoes by Christian Louboutin

Yes, Kristen, we’re well aware that your hideous, still-on-from-last-night eyeliner and atrocious, zombified hair are supposed to signal that YOU DON’T GIVE A FUCK. But even though I don’t like anything about this dress, its designer has a right to not have you make a fucking mockery of his career by donning this “it’s finals week and I haven’t washed my hair or in longer than I can remember” aesthetic while wearing his gown on the red carpet.

Need more? Check out Part 2 and Part 3!

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© Democracy Diva, 2012.
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