Round 1 keeps chugging right along. Are you keeping up?
KEIRA KNIGHTLEY vs. CHANEL IMAN
Keira in Prada; Chanel in Reem Acra
Keira: Ugh. Mondays.
Chanel: Preach, sister.
Keira in Dolce & Gabbana; Chanel in Reem Acra
Keira: I just can’t be expected to be a functioning human being quite yet.
Chanel: Hear, hear. Particularly when I can’t drink coffee in this dress, for fear of spilling it and scalding 80% of my bare skin.
Keira in Valentino; Chanel in Monique Lhuillier
Keira: That’s why I stick to dark colors. Hides the coffee stains better.
Chanel: Too true. I actually dumped an entire French press on this gown on my way here, and you can’t even tell!
Keira in Erdem; Chanel in Zuhair Murad
Keira: Lucky. I can’t wait to pop this baby out so I can reignite my desperate caffeine addiction.
Chanel: Don’t worry. Til then, there’s always tequila!
KAROLINA KURKOVA vs. SHAILENE WOODLEY
Karolina in Valentino; Shailene in Mary Katrantzou
Karolina: I think something is wrong with your feet, darling. Why do your shoes sit flat on the floor like that?
Shailene: Um, they’re flats? Not heels?
Karolina in Viktor & Rolf; Shailene in Balmain
Karolina: Flat shoes, you say? But, I don’t understand.
Shailene: It’s really not that difficult a concept.
Karolina in Schiaparelli; Shailene in Ralph Lauren
Karolina: But in flat shoes, how do you add inches to your already 5’11” frame?
Shailene: Um, why would you need to?
Karolina in Marchesa; Shailene in Zuhair Murad
Karolina: Because how can I possibly be the most intimidating version of myself unless I am unfairly beautiful, impossibly stylish, AND over six feet tall?
Shailene: Ugh. Models are the worst.
NAOMI WATTS vs. KATE MARA
Naomi in Giorgio Armani; Kate in Gucci
Naomi: So. How’s Kevin Spacey?
Kate: … I’m sure he’s just fine.
Naomi in Preen; Kate in Alexander Wang for H&M
Naomi: You guys don’t still hang out?
Kate: He’s KEVIN SPACEY. Of course we don’t hang out.
Naomi in Gucci Première; Kate in Dior
Naomi: Oh, that’s such a disappointment.
Kate: Why?
Naomi in Marchesa; Kate in Valentino
Naomi: Uh, because I’m done binge-watching House of Cards and I’m going to lose my mind if I have to wait another year to find out what happens?
Kate: Oh, is that show still on? I kind of thought it ended once I died.
ZOE SALDANA vs. JANUARY JONES
Zoe in Roksanda; January in Roksanda
Zoe: Me.
January: What?
Zoe in Nina Ricci; January in Sandro
Zoe: Oh, sorry. I was responding to the question of “who wore it better.” And the answer is ME.
January: *rolls eyes*
Zoe in Victoria Beckham; January in Hugo Boss
Zoe: Don’t you scoff at me. Not with a fake-ass name like “January.” What, was “October” just too ordinary for you?
January: Back off, bitch. January is my real name.
Zoe in Valentino; January in Prabal Gurung
Zoe: Ohhh, so your parents smoked crack. That explains a lot, actually.
January: At least I have an explanation for my particular brand crazy. What’s your excuse?
—
© Democracy Diva, 2015.
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The Democracy Diva 
Respond to March Fabness 2015, Round 1: Prada Bracket