Yes, the Emma Watson bracket is finally here, and no, I didn’t purposefully save her for the last bracket just torment you. 

EMILY BLUNT vs. EMMA WATSON

Emily: I’m so sorry we have to begin this adventure with this giant, terrifying photo of Johnny Depp behind me.

Emma: Yes, that is quite creepy and unfortunate.

Emily: Well, I suppose we’ll just have to carry on.

Emma: It’s so brave of you to keep your chin up like this.

Emily: Why do you say that?

Emma: Honey. I’ve won this competition three out of four years. There’s no way you’re beating me in the first goddamn round.

Emily: If I can survive working with Tom Cruise, there is nothing I can’t do.

Emma: Well, there’s no arguing with that.

KATE BOSWORTH vs. MICHELLE DOCKERY

Kate: Lady Mary! I’m sorry, do you mind if I call you Lady Mary?

Michelle: Oh, sweetie. Not even a little tiny bit.

Kate: So, what’s 1920s birth control like?

Michelle: Uncomfortable.

Kate: I can imagine. Say, do you want to drink a couple of sidecars and try on hats?

Michelle: Um, only ALWAYS.

Kate: Good. I’ll see you in that really fancy train car.

Michelle: It’s a date.

SOLANGE KNOWLES vs. SELENA GOMEZ

Solange: Good to see you again, Selena.

Selena: Solange! Is Bey – I mean – um, how are you?

Solange: No, go ahead. I know you want to ask about Beyoncé. It’s okay.

Selena: No! I wasn’t! I was going to ask if bey – uh, if being – um…

Solange: Really, it’s okay. Just ask.

Selena: OMG WHAT’S IT LIKE BEING BEYONCÉ’S SISTER DO YOU ALSO HAVE MAGICAL POWERS JUST LIKE HER ALSO WHAT HAPPENED IN THE ELEVATOR AND CAN YOU GET BEY TO DO A DUET WITH ME AND SHE TOTALLY HATES THAT JAY MAKES HER HANG OUT WITH KIM KARDASHIAN RIGHT?!

Solange: Flawless, yes, you’ll never know, no, and yes.

Selena: I knew it.

EDDIE REDMAYNE vs. KRISTEN BELL

Eddie: Cheerio, Princess Anna! How are you on this lovely day?

Kristen: What are you even doing here?

Eddie: Why, competing against you in a vicious fashion battle, of course!

Kristen: Really? Are you allowed to have a penis in this competition?

Eddie: First of all, I’m British, you can’t say the word “penis” to me. And second, I find that offensive.

Kristen: Offensive? Why?

Eddie: Fabness isn’t reserved for women. I’m not some basic bitch wearing the same middle-management suit every damn day.

Kristen: I’m sorry, Eddie. You’re right. I didn’t mean to imply that you were a basic bitch. Also, your velvet tuxedo jacket is amazing.

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© Democracy Diva, 2015.
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