CAMILLA BELLE at the Tribeca Film Festival // dress by Prada, purse by Christian Louboutin, shoes by Rupert Sanderson
Camilla Belle is one of those starlets I always forget about, because she doesn’t really exist in my world outside B-list red carpet events. But when she does appear, I’m always just a little bit in awe of her pretty darn consistently fabulous style. I love the hair and makeup – it makes her look like a supermodel from the late sixties/early seventies. The dress is obviously adorable, and though I’m not always pro-matching, the shoes are definitely perfect. Satin purses aren’t my fave, but the fact that all the matching blues are in different textures and fabrics makes for quite a delicious look.
FLORENCE WELCH in Las Vegas // gown by Tadashi Shoji
A redhead in green, a gown on the rare woman statuesque enough to pull off the length – it’s all working for Flo. The makeup’s a tad sickly, but my complaints end there, because this dress looks tailor-made for her. Simply gorgeous.
TILDA SWINTON in New York City // jumpsuit by Celine
Tilda Swinton is one of the only actresses alive who makes me appreciate minimalist fashion. I have to force myself to enjoy the stark, severe modernism of that particular aesthetic, since it’s never been my cup of tea. But I look at Tilda, in her absurdly shaped jumpsuit and its perfect three-quarter length sleeves, and I dig it. I really do.
LADY GAGA in Seoul // gown by Atelier Versace
Not to be outdone by the competition, Lady Gaga stepped off a plane in this plunging Versace ensemble. I’m a bit done with seeing Gaga’s sternum, but it’s good to know that her sleep mask is encrusted with pearls. The way God intended it.
CLAIRE DANES at the Tribeca Film Festival // dress by Narcisco Rodriguez
The dress is chic, but I wish the hem hit an inch higher. Not much else to comment on, since this is the kind of dress that usually does all the work for you.
CLAIRE DANES in New York City // dress and shoes by Lanvin
The hair is terrifying and the shoes are worse, but I want to like the dress. I really do. I bet in person it’s fantastic, but I can’t get over the shininess of it all, and it’s not a great dress for her frame. I’d love it in a dimmer light on Dakota Fanning, though.
CATHERINE, DUCHESS OF CAMBRIDGE at the London premiere of African Cats // dress by Matthew Williamson
A baby step forward into more interesting fashion – the bejeweled cuffs and collar. Let’s face it, it’s a really fucking adorable dress. Of course she dulled it down with the shoes and purse, but, it’s still Duchess Kate, after all.
GWYNETH PALTROW in New York City // dress by Burberry Prorsum, purse by Victoria Beckham, shoes by Sergio Rossi
I’m no Gwyneth fan – do I start every single post about her with that disclaimer? – but YUMMY to this whole outfit. Nails, purse, and shoes are terrific, and the dress obviously looks great on her, but it’s that rare dress that would actually look good on human women too!
VICTORIA BECKHAM in Hong Kong // sweater by Miu Miu, dress by Victoria Beckham, shoes by Christian Louboutin
Victoria Beckham has worn approximately eight different Victoria Beckham dresses this week, all nearly identical to each other. I actually think she’s a talented, body-conscious, female-minded designer, but I also think her desperate pushing of her own clothes is getting a bit ridiculous. Posh, celebrities are already obsessed with your dresses – see below – so don’t feel the need to wear your own designs at every. single. event. That being said – cute dress, but I can’t really get over Victoria Beckham in a cardigan. It just seems wrong.
ALISON BRIE at the Tribeca Film Festival // dress by Victoria Beckham, shoes by Brian Atwood
I love Community, I love Mad Men, and lord almighty, do I love me some Alison Brie. Hair and makeup are much more chic and simple than usual, and her Victoria Beckham LWD is cute, if slightly ill-fitting. The gorgeous shoes and cuff really bring the outfit together. Bring on the fab red carpet looks, Alison!
JENNIFER LAWRENCE in Madrid // dress by Victoria Beckham, shoes by Yves Saint Laurent
The Girl on Fire hit Spain in, yes, another Victoria Beckham dress. It’s fantastic, if a wee bit small on her, but I love the baseball tee style. And the shoes were a good choice.
LEA MICHELE in Beverly Hills // dress by Oscar de la Renta, shoes by Stella McCartney
Oh, she realized we’re sick of seeing her ridiculously dramatic leg-pops and sexy pouts on the red carpet, did she? You can’t fool us with this sweet-and-innocent thing, Lea. We all know you’re itching to pull out a plunging neckline and a vag-high slit.
KRISTEN WIIG at the Tribeca Film Festival // dress by Theyskens’ Theory, shoes by Nicholas Kirkwood
Cute dress, destroyed by awful accessories. Let me be your guide, Kristen Wiig.
OLIVIA WILDE at the Tribeca Film Festival // dress by Prada, shoes by Aperlai
She looks like she’s wearing a slip and got caught in a bedsheet. And who on earth was responsible for choosing that shoe? Fire them.
MICHELLE WILLIAMS at the Tribeca Film Festival // dress by Giambattista Valli
I know she hasn’t worn actually this dress before, but she’s worn this dress a hundred times before. I don’t actually mind the dress, but with her pixie cut and porcelain skin and doll-like stance and girly shoes, it’s just a little bit too much twee-ness for me to handle.
EMMA WATSON at the Tribeca Film Festival // jacket, dress, purse, and shoes by Miu Miu
Emma Watson, you are embarrassing my dear readers, who have TWICE voted you Fabbest of them All in the brutal March Fabness competition. This is how you repay them for this almighty honor? With this mish-mosh of hipster garbage borrowed from Alexa Chung and Kristen Stewart’s wardrobes? For shame, Hermione Granger. For shame.
SARAH JESSICA PARKER in Chicago // coat by Oscar de la Renta, gown by Rochas
I love her coat; I really do. But this whole tiny little woman in a MASSIVE coat over a MASSIVE gown thing looks a little ridiculous. She’s like a grown woman dressing like a little girl playing dress-up in her grandmother’s clothes, if that makes any sense at all.
SARAH JESSICA PARKER in New York City // gown by Oscar de la Renta
Does Sarah Jessica Parker know that she’s not, in fact, Carrie Bradshaw? Add some curls to her hair and the signature nameplate necklace and I swear I’d think this was straight out of some godforsaken Sex and the City sequel.
ALEXA CHUNG in New York City // dress and purse by Chanel
That dress would look beautiful on a toddler, wouldn’t it? But grown women in frilly velvet diapers? That’s a little bit sad. And the Zooey Deschanel black stockings/ugly black shoes trend has clearly been taken up by the other most insufferable hipster on the red carpet, Ms. Alexa Chung. The hair is actually not as bad as it used to be, though I’m not ready to say that she doesn’t look so Girl, Interrupted anymore.
RIHANNA in New York City // dress by Marchesa, shoes by Christian Louboutin
Uh-oh! Rihanna thought the Time 100 party was actually a drag ball/1980s themed party! I mean, that’s the only conceivable explanation for her 80s prom dress, complete with Madonna cone bra, and drag queen hair, makeup, and nails, right?