What, you thought we were done?
Let’s finish this damn thing.
Let’s hit the red carpet – it’s awards season, bitches.
Believe it or not, the Golden Globes are not the only awards show in existence! The stars got a week off to exfoliate, and now they’re back on their bullshit – and more importantly, I’m back on mine.
Welcome to the first-ever Golden Globe Awards actually worth discussing!
Welcome to the best, brightest, and whitest night of the year!
Let’s finish up this shit-show of an Academy Awards, dear.