Vampires! Witches! Velvet scrunchies!
Your Cannes coverage ends here, dears.
Your Met Gala finale is here, dear readers.
Believe it or not, the Golden Globes are not the only awards show in existence! The stars got a week off to exfoliate, and now they’re back on their bullshit – and more importantly, I’m back on mine.
Welcome to the first-ever Golden Globe Awards actually worth discussing!
You didn’t think I’d forgotten about you, did you?
Welcome back, bitches!
Buckle up, divas. This red carpet is a DISASTER.
Welcome to 2016, divas! Let’s start the year off with a bang.
New York! London! Milan! Paris! Mars! (Oh, are there not fashion shows on Mars yet? Damn. Karl Lagerfeld really needs to get his shit together.)