The Week in Celebrity Fashion, Part 1

The red carpets were on fire this week, from movie premieres to fashion industry events. Get on your bitch pants and… 

EMMA STONE in a Giambattista Valli dress and Christian Louboutin shoes

Photo: Taylor Hill/FilmMagic via People

First out of the gates is the eternally fantastic Emma Stone. We all know it takes a special kind of ginger to wear red OR pink, and an even fiercer one to wear both. Yes, the pumps are so nude, they’re practically invisible, but that’s actually a good thing with this bold, bright dress. With this much dress, who wants a shoe you can even see? It’ll just distract. I love these colors on her porcelain skin, and I hope she keeps this hair color forever.

RYAN GOSLING in Gucci

Photo: Tom & Lorenzo

Let’s give a little love to Beardy Gosling, who dared to rock a shiny, patterned Gucci suit and didn’t look totally gay doing it. Just like, a little bicurious.

CHLOE MORETZ

Photo: Dave M. Benett/Getty via People

Between Hailee Steinfeld, Dakota Fanning, and now Chloe Moretz, there are way too many 13 to 14-year-olds with wardrobes I’d die to have. It’s getting embarrassing.

MARISA TOMEI in a Vivienne Westwood dress and Sergio Rossi shoes

Photo: Tom & Lorenzo

A tad on the dull side, due to the accessories, but the neckline is too, too beautiful.

MILA KUNIS in a Versace dress and Jimmy Choo shoes

Photo: Bauer Griffin via Zimbio

Snooze.

ZOE SALDANA in a Balmain suit and Brian Atwood shoes

Photo: Michael Williams/Startraks via People

What a fierce summer suit. She looks chic and laid-back and utterly fabulous, especially with her green studded pumps.

CAMILLA BELLE in a Dolce & Gabbana dress and Miu Miu shoes

Photo: Brian To/FilmMagic via People

The shoes make the outfit, but I’m not entirely sure I like them. I can’t tell if they’re fantastic or uber-tacky.

LAUREN CONRAD in Rebecca Minkoff

Photo: Jonathan Leibson/FilmMagic via People

Great silhouette for her, even if it is boring as the day is long.

TAYLOR SWIFT

Photo: Justin Campbell/Startraks via People

Taylor, you’re too old to wear those shoes. It’s embarrassing how tweened-out she still looks as she ages whilst clinging desperately to her young fans, determined not to go the Miley Road. The excessive shimmery powder all over her face makes her look like a Disney princess, but in the cartoon way, not in the awesome way. And honey, get a hair cut. And grow up.

LADY GAGA

Photo: PacificCoastNews.com via Zimbio

Probably the dullest thing I’ve seen Gaga wear. Is she a half-puppet Catholic schoolgirl?

MILA KUNIS in a dress and shoes by Lanvin

Photo: Bill Davila/Startraks via People

Mila, stop wasting your hot body on boring clothes. Do the world a favor and throw on something interesting for once.

COURTNEY LOVE

Photo: Stephen Lovekin/Getty via Zimbio

Oof. A bandage dress is bad enough [when it’s worn by Courtney Love], but when it’s ill-fitting and in various shades of butt-ugly, it’s a head-to-toe hot disaster.

HILLARY DUFF in an Isabel Marant jacket and Christian Louboutin shoes

Photo: FilmMagic via People

Cute jacket, but if it weren’t for the Ray Bans, she’d look like a middle-aged wealthy housewife in this get-up.

ASHLEY TISDALE

Photo: Denise Truscello/WireImage via People

A napkin is not a dress. I repeat: A NAPKIN IS NOT A DRESS.

JENNIFER ANISTON in a Celine dress and Gucci shoes

Photo: Dave Hogan/Getty via Zimbio

Does she really expect people to believe her legs are actually that tan? Come on. I call bullshit. And, duh, she looks boring as ever.

VANESSA HUDGENS in a Farah Khan dress and Giuseppe Zanotti shoes

Photo: Michael Williams/Startraks via People

Impressive! And by impressive, I mean I’m impressed that one woman can manage to have mental-patient hair, an astonishingly ugly and ill-fitting tunic, and tacky mismatched accessories all at the same time. She must be exhausted from her own fugliness.

LADY GAGA

Photo: PacificCoastNews.com via Zimbio

She wore this a few days ago, but I’m just imagining Gaga running around in this get-up in the weather we had today. I love Gaga, but her antics sometimes make me want to see her wrapped in plastic and leather when the heat index is a hundred and fifteen degrees.

ALICIA KEYS

Photo: Jerritt Clark/Getty via People

Whoever works for Alicia Keys and did not have the balls to tell her the truth about how she looks in this dress, you should be ashamed of yourself. This hot disaster is on YOU.

ROSIE HUNTINGTON-WHITELEY in a Chloé gown and Jimmy Choo shoes

Photo: Jun Sato/WireImage via People

No one, not even a model/Megan Fox replacement like Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, could possibly look good in this dress. Rosie must be the least self-aware person on earth if she looked into the mirror and could not see that her breasts hang down to her bellybutton in this gown.

Don’t forget to check back on Sunday night for Part 2 of your weekly fashion recap!


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