It’s Monday. You deserve a break and a bitchfest.
ELLE FANNING in Los Angeles
dress by Vivienne Westwood, shoes by Christian Louboutin
I have nothing to say except this:
KRISTEN BELL in Los Angeles
gown by Andrew Gn
Welcome to the wonderful world of Kristen Bell’s maternity wear. Loose-fitting but glam and all-around adorable.
HAILEE STEINFELD in Los Angeles
dress by A.L.C., shoes by Christian Louboutin
What does she condition her hair with, the blood of newborn babies? HOW IS IT SO SHINY? Anyway, everything about this is youthful and relaxed and lovely, if a bit on the casual side for the event.
DEMI LOVATO in New York City
dress by Ted Baker, shoes by Saint Laurent
I fucking adore this outfit. Who is styling Demi Lovato nowadays? There’s been a really noticeable improvement in her style recently. I am on board.
JENNA COLEMAN in New York City
dress by Christian Dior, shoes by Manolo Blahnik
I definitely thought this Doctor Who actress was like 17 years old based on this photo. She looks like Rose Byrne’s baby sister. Anyway, this dress is fantastic. Love the long sleeves and, of course, the pockets.
KATE MARA at the Creative Arts Emmys
dress and shoes by Christian Dior
This dress is just a little bit more complicated than it needs to be. Some of that asymmetry looks like a mistake. But it’s bright and interesting and the shoes are cool, so I feel okay supporting it.
UZO ADUBA at the Creative Arts Emmys
gown by Costume National, purse by Lee Savage
Let’s hear it for the fabulous Uzo “Crazy Eyes” Aduba, who won an Emmy for her truly incredible performance on Orange is the New Black. I am so goddamn happy this phenomenally talented woman is now an Emmy winner. This gown makes her look statuesque, and the construction at the top is interesting, if a little perplexing.
LAVERNE COX at the Creative Arts Emmys
gown by Donna Karan
You work that Beyoncé shit, girl. You flawless.
JAMES MARSDEN in Los Angeles
suit by Ermenegildo Zegna, shoes by Givenchy
Get ready for a ton of man-candy, dear readers. We’ll kick things off with the beautiful James Marsden, whose shoes are so fabulous that I’m praying they come in my size. Well done, sir.
MICHAEL B. JORDAN in New York City
suit by Ermenegildo Zegna
What a gorgeous view. And the skyline isn’t half bad either.
HEIDI KLUM at the Creative Arts Emmys
gown by Sean Kelly
Methinks somebody at Lifetime fucked up and thought the Creative Arts Emmys were next week, because I’m pretty sure this is the winning look from this week’s episode of Project Runway… which hasn’t aired yet. Whoops! Anyway, congrats to Sean. This isn’t particularly fascinating – the shape is about as basic as can be – but I like the color and the fringe.
ALEXA CHUNG in London
dress by Emilia Wickstead, shoes by Bionda Castana
I’m tired of the hipster ballerina thing. Can we move onto something else, please?
CHANNING TATUM in Los Angeles
suit by Gucci
It could fit better, or he could just not be wearing anything at all. Let’s go with the latter.
KELLAN LUTZ in Los Angeles
suit by Ermenegildo Zegna
Black-on-black feels a little dated to me, but he is a vampire, so maybe it’s more difficult to catch up to fashion trends when you’re going to live forever. #vampirefashionproblems
ROBERT PATTINSON in Los Angeles
suit by Gucci
Wow. He is doing an excellent impression of someone who actually gives a shit about how he appears on the red carpet. Who convinced Robert Pattinson to shower sometime in the last month? They deserve a raise.
ODEYA RUSH in Miami
dress by Paper London, shoes by Charlotte Olympia
Love the clothes; hate the shoes.
BELLAMY YOUNG at the Creative Arts Emmys
gown by Naeem Khan, purse by Amanda Pearl
It’s a gorgeous dress, but I don’t think it’s the right dress for Scandal‘s First Lady. It’s too big, and I’m not sure that greenish-gold really works with her coloring.
SOFIA VERGARA in Los Angeles
dress by My Revolving Closet
Points for it not being the same mermaid gown she’s worn a hundred thousand times before, but I’m not a fan. The length is just awkward.
CAT DEELEY at the Creative Arts Emmys
top and skirt by Sachin & Babi, purse and shoes by Christian Louboutin
No. That crop top should be burned in a fire. Every celebrity on earth is wearing crop tops right now, but this one hits at the wrong place on her torso and flattens her chest out completely. And the straps don’t fit at all. Also, does that hemline look weird and puckery to anyone else? Someone fire whoever tailored this entire look, please.
NIKKI REED at the Creative Arts Emmys
gown by Versace
I hate to be the one to break this to you, Nikki, but you are not Jennifer Lopez and it is not 1999.