Welcome to Fashion Prom! 

Hundreds of stars flocked to the Costume Institute for the Annual Met Gala, where the theme was China: Through the Looking Glass. This resulted in a red carpet full of cheongsam dresses, eastern florals,  and starlets too confused to understand the theme. But you can always count on a model to wear whatever the designer who paid for her ticket tells her to wear understand a theme, so let’s take a peek through the expertly-tailored looking glass.

LILY ALDRIDGE
gown by Carolina Herrera, purse by Judith Leiber

There are two Democracy Diva Cardinal Rules for Met Gala Fashion. Rule #1: adhere to the theme. Bonus points if you do it in a particularly unique or stylish way, but even a cheesy attempt at theme dressing is better than nothing at all. And Rule #2: Act like this is the only red carpet event you get to go to this year, and choose your outfit accordingly. Extra credit goes to those who wear something that simply cannot be worn anywhere else but the Met Gala.

Lily Aldridge is tearing shit up on both counts. The subtle touches of China – the Mandarin-style collar, the koi purse – are breathtaking. The sleek, slick hair, light jade earrings, and dark lips were all brilliant styling choices. And it’s not every woman who can carry a pale blue gown with an ocean of ruffles on it, but Lily wears it as naturally as I wear my obscure musical theater tee shirts.

KAROLINA KURKOVA
dress by Tommy Hilfiger, purse by Judith Leiber, shoes by Giuseppe Zanotti

Slaying it. Karolina always takes the Met Gala as her personal opportunity to remind the world that she is the greatest, and I thank her for that. We’ve got theme, and drama, and a total lack of re-wearability – that’s the Met Gala trifecta.

GEORGIA MAY JAGGER
gown by Gucci

Mick Jagger’s daughter can DRESS. As if her embroidered robe isn’t fantastic enough, the shoes are insane and also maybe exploding with fuzzy balls? I don’t know, but somehow, I love it.

CARA DELEVINGNE
jumpsuit by Stella McCartney

On an evening filled to the brim with cascading botanical scenes, It Girl Cara Delevingne blew away the competition with fake floral tattoos. I’m not sure another woman alive could make this jumpsuit work, but Cara can, and I think the body art is exceptionally brilliant. Weird and surprising, which is all I ever want to see on the red carpet.

JOAN SMALLS
gown by Roberto Cavalli

Are embroidered, cascading florals necessarily Chinese, or is that too broad to really consider this theme dressing? I’m undecided on that, but at least Joan WENT FOR IT in this sheer purple dream. Plenty of divas went sheer for the Gala (we’ll get to them in their own post), but Joan somehow showed the most skin and still looked the most expensive. It helps that this color is basically a blessing from the fashion gods. Can we see more of this purple on the red carpet, please?

JOURDAN DUNN
gown by Burberry, shoes by Christian Louboutin

The textile is amazing, and something about the woven details and the structure of the bodice feels thematically appropriate to me. The styling isn’t quite there, but I blame that on every stylist’s apparent need to throw jade jewelry on every celebrity in a three-mile radius of the Met. I love a pop of color and a subtle nod to the theme, but those earrings make no sense with this gown.

EMILY RATAJKOWSKI
dress by Topshop, purse by Rauwolf, shoes by Brian Atwood

Emily’s got Rule #1 (theme dressing) down pat. The branches-and-blossoms embroidery (which we’re seeing everywhere at this event) are lovely, and the neckline feels like a modern take on a 20s Chinese socialite. But she needs some work on Rule #2 – this just isn’t special enough for the Met Gala, at least not the way she styled it. It’s hard enough to make a simple-silhouetted dress look formal next to a red carpet full of gowns. But adding platform pumps – the undisputed basic bitch of formal red carpet shoes – certainly isn’t helping.

ROSIE HUNTINGTON-WHITELEY
gown by Versace

It’s a stunning gown, but we’ve seen this from Versace a dozen times before. I need a little more surprise for an event this major.

POPPY DELEVINGNE
gown by Marchesa, purse by Edie Parker

Her name is Poppy. And she’s wearing poppies. I may need to take a break to go throw up real quick.

NAOMI CAMPBELL
gown by Burberry

This is pretty much the only thing Naomi ever wears, but don’t tell her that or she’ll throw a phone at you.

ADRIANA LIMA
gown by Marc Jacobs, purse by Judith Leiber

I didn’t even recognize the newly-90s-gothed-out Adriana Lima. I’m not really sure what the thought process behind this was, but I’m not on board.

KENDALL JENNER
gown by Calvin Klein

Nice color, but her sideboob is crooked.

KAREN ELSON
gown by Dolce & Gabbana

Am I missing something? Did China go through a baroque period? This just seems Italian to the point of absurdity. Which would be fine, if this event weren’t, you know, specifically about an entirely different country. It’s a shame, because I’m impressed by her ability to pull off that crown, but I just can’t get on board for this dress at THIS Met Gala.

KARLIE KLOSS and GIGI HADID
Karlie’s gown by Atelier Versace
Gigi’s gown by Diane von Furstenberg, shoes by Christian Louboutin

They thought this was the Oscars.

MIRANDA KERR
dress by Louis Vuitton, shoes by Giuseppe Zanotti

Miranda puts more effort into her outfit when she’s walking her goddamn dog. There is no excuse for your lackadaisical attitude, Ms. Kerr. Shape up.

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© Democracy Diva, 2015.
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