Met Gala 2015: The Worst Dressed

Okay, let’s do this, because the Met Gala was like a hundred years ago and we REALLY need to get some bitching done.

SARAH JESSICA PARKER
gown by H&M, hat by Philip Treacy

Photo: Larry Busacca/Getty

I need to take a really deep breath or maybe a Xanax before we tackle this one, so, give me a moment, please.

Okay. I KNOW I am aggressively pro-theme-dressing for the Met Gala. (For evidence, see literally all my other Met Gala posts.) But even the Democracy Diva has her limits, you guys. And her limits are TASSELLED HEADDRESSES MADE OF FABRIC FLAMES. She looks like a chandelier at an Atlantic City casino, for God’s sake. Or maybe this is the crown Daenerys Targaryen is going to wear when she finally gets her ass on the Iron Throne. Either way, WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK IS HAPPENING HERE?

MARY-KATE OLSEN and ASHLEY OLSEN

Photo: Jamie McCarthy/FilmMagic

Here is your annual reminder that the Olsen twins are still the worst. (But I do have a new Elizabeth and James silk tank top that I got majorly discounted at Nordstrom Rack, so I guess I like them a little bit.)

VANESSA HUDGENS
dress by H&M, headpiece by Gigi Burris, shoes by Alexandre Birman

Photo: David Fisher/Rex

Vanessa got lost on the way to the Gatsby-themed Met Gala.

RUTH WILSON
dress by Oscar de la Renta

Photo: Rex

I think her facial expression tells you everything you need to know, and it also mirrors my exact emotions right now.

RITA ORA
gown by Tom Ford

Photo: Larry Busacca/Getty

Vampires are, like, SO five years ago, Rita. We’ve already been through like three other supernatural trends since then. Where is your werewolf gown? Why did you breeze right by “zombie chic”?

KATIE HOLMES
gown by Zac Posen

Photo: Larry Busacca/Getty

Isn’t this the same haircut Katie gave her daughter when she was like, three years old? That can’t be a good sign.

CAREY MULLIGAN
gown by Balenciaga

Photo: Larry Busacca/Getty

Depressing.

SELENA GOMEZ
gown by Vera Wang

Photo: David Fisher/Rex

Sideboob tassels. I repeat: SIDEBOOB. TASSELS. Isn’t that a felony? It should be.

CHLOË MORETZ
gown by Coach

Photo: Larry Busacca/Getty

STOP DRESSING LIKE THIS IS A DISNEY MOVIE PREMIERE. THE MET GALA IS TOO IMPORTANT FOR YOUR BULLSHIT.

DAKOTA JOHNSON
dress and purse by Chanel, shoes by Bally

Photo: Larry Busacca/Getty

I’m incapable of separating Dakota’s fashion choices from her decision to star in the most god-awful rape-culture-promoting garbage movie of all time. But even if she wasn’t the worst character in the worst story based on ANOTHER worst character in ANOTHER worst story, I think I would still hate this outfit. And her hair. And her crooked eyeliner. And pretty much everything else about her.

IRINA SHAYK
gown by Atelier Versace

Photo: Larry Busacca/Getty

Holy hideous bridesmaid, Batman!

KERRY WASHINGTON
gown, purse, and shoes by Prada

Photo: Larry Busacca/Getty

This is the worst thing to happen to Olivia Pope since… well, basically everything that happened on this godforsaken season of Scandal.


© Democracy Diva, 2015.
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6 responses to Met Gala 2015: The Worst Dressed

    • democracydiva – Author

      The dress is fine, but I don’t think it was quite good enough to make up for all the terrible styling decisions. And I didn’t even get into those bracelets, which seem to belong to an entirely different outfit.

  1. Lougarry

    Don’t judge me but I really love that head-dress. I adore Philip Treacy. And I want it for Mad Hatter theme day at school next week.

    That dress Kerry Washington is wearing is sooooo unflattering. Gruesome.

    • democracydiva – Author

      I LOVE Philip Treacy in general, but this specific hat was a big bucket of NOPE for me. (Though I think it sounds perfect for your school’s theme day. Also, that theme day sounds freakin’ awesome.)

      Last night’s Scandal was the worst piece of garbage I’ve ever seen… and I STILL think Kerry’s dress was worse.

  2. Lougarry

    Just zoomed in for a better look. Still love the head-dress, but what is going on with SJP’s eyes? Is she possessed?

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