What, you thought we were done?.
Best Dressed: KAROLINA KURKOVA
gown by Marchesa x IBM
If those flowers kind of look like they’re glowing, it’s not because you’re drunk – it’s because they are. It’s 150 LED lights that lit up and changed colors based on how many people were tweeting #CognitiveDress. Now THAT is some Manus x Machina shit right there. Kudos, Karolina. Girlfriend does not fuck around when it comes to the Met Gala.
Runner-Up: ZENDAYA COLEMAN
gown by Michael Kors
Okay, so it’s actually a little bit basic, at least for Zendaya and the theme of the evening. But even though there’s no Michael Kors gown in the world that will really push the boundaries of fashion, Zendaya found a way to bring her particular brand of badassery to this dress, with the bowl haircut (somehow chic, in defiance of all logic) and the dark jewels. Out of all the women who heard “tech” and thought “metallics,” Zendaya at least did so FLAWLESSLY.
Honorable Mention: BEYONCÉ KNOWLES
gown by Givenchy
Love the latex, though I’m not sold on the smoky eye or the clutch. But I won’t make fun of a woman who’s wearing the skin of her enemies. That’s some House Bolton shit right there.
Solange is wearing rubber thigh-high stirrups, and none of us should be surprised.
gown by Tory Burch
I thought this was a total snooze until I realized those embellishments were color-changing crystal panels. So, at least she made a solid attempt at the theme, even though the wires hidden in the seams are making this look a little wrinkled and awkward. But, hey, I’ll take a swing and a miss over a refusal to swing any day of the week.
tuxedo by Gucci
Well, at least it’s not another black tux!
gown and shoes by Atelier Versace
Loathe as I am to compliment anyone in the Kardashian Klan, I’ll give her this one. It’s a cool dress, and she looks great in it.
gown by Marchesa, purse by Oroton
A flapper gown + thirty pounds of metal does not equal “technology,” Poppy. Also, there is definitely a such thing as too many accessories, and you passed that line about 30 necklaces ago.
gown by Atelier Versace, shoes by Giuseppe Zanotti
I feel like I should care more about seeing a harness on the red carpet, but… I don’t. The color is boring, and even the harness doesn’t do enough to make this particularly memorable.
gown by Peter Pilotto
Girlfriend always shows up looking like upholstery.
suit by Calvin Klein, choker by Jennifer Fisher
Fly as fuck… for a different event. But I’m not really seeing the link between this disco-leisure suit and technology, even though I want to, because I think Amandla is a goddamn national treasure.
jumpsuit by Atelier Versace
Honestly? This is kind of boring. It’s standard four-years-ago Gaga with some extra 80s hair metal styling thrown in for good measure. It’s not nearly wild enough for this event.
gown by Prada, shoes by Christian Louboutin
Another fucking harness? Really? And also, what the fuck happened to Emma Stone’s fashion sense? She used to be one of my favorite celebrities to watch, but now, it’s just a sea of mildly disappointing and majorly unremarkable gowns.
gown by Coach
A total waste of time.
gown by Moschino
Poorly-fit, off-theme, and frankly, kind of exhausting.
gown by Versace
One of the ugliest red carpet gowns in recent memory.
gown by Simone Rocha
It must be nice to be in Ms. Sevigny’s head, where the entire world is some weird themed party that combines 1930s Hollywood with 1990s ecstasy-fueled raves.
gown by Louis Vuitton
gown by Gucci
gown by Rosie Assoulin
I don’t even know what I’m looking at.
gown by Valentino
Ballerina who got hit by a bus.
gown by Givenchy
I didn’t think anything could make me hate America more than Donald Trump did… until I saw this dress.
We’ll finish up the #MetGala2016 coverage tomorrow by tearing apart the most basic of bitches. Stay tuned!