2015 Emmy Awards, Part 3

Let’s finish this goddamn thing. 

Best DressedKERRY WASHINGTON
dress by Marc Jacobs

Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty

It’s cool and tough and sexy and weird. Also, Olivia Pope sprouted wings:

Photo: Charles Sykes/Invision/AP

I love it all.

Runner-UpSARAH PAULSON
gown by Prabal Gurung, purse by Rauwolf

Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty

Pretend the hair isn’t happening, and this is one of my favorite red carpet looks of all time. Slam motherfucking dunk.

Honorable Mention: TATIANA MASLANY
suit by Bouchra Jarrar, shoes by Sophia Webster

Photo: John Shearer/WireImage

I can’t tell if the relaxed fit is perfect, or it’s a regular-fit tuxedo that just doesn’t actually fit her. But, screw it, you know I’m a complete sucker for formal ladypants, so I love this anyway.

LADY GAGA
gown by Brandon Maxwell

Photo: Mark Davis/Getty

God bless the person on Gaga’s staff who said, “Listen, Stef, could you just calm down maybe for one night, since the Emmys are SERIOUSLY not about you?” She looks breathtaking, and shockingly appropriate. It would have been a diva move – and not the good kind – to show up to the Emmys in a dress made of human fingernails or whatever.

JANUARY JONES
jumpsuit by Ulyana Sergeenko

Photo: Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP

Sure, maybe she looks like she’s not all the way finished transitioning from mermaid to human, and also I think she slept on her hair wrong.  But is it wrong that I like this? Maybe I’m just sick of seeing the same goddamn dress over and over again. Maybe I’ve finally snapped. Or maybe I just firmly believe in a starlet’s right to Gumby.

You can never unsee this.

You can never unsee this.

EMMA ROBERTS
gown by Jenny Packham, purse by Lee Savage

Photo: Steve Granitz/WireImage

I usually find her incredibly basic, and I’ll never really buy her as a blonde, but I’ll admit it, Emma Roberts turned it the fuck out. But like, in a quietly pretty way.

LENA HEADEY
gown by Zuhair Murad

Photo: Frazer Harrison/Getty

Serving up murderous incestuous regal realness with this gown. In Cersei’s case, that’s a good thing. But her makeup artist was clearly hired by the Tyrells to destroy her.

ARIEL WINTER
gown by Romona Keveza

Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty

Ok, I won’t pretend I’ve never seen this gown before, but this is some sophisticated-ass shit for a 17-year-old.

UZO ADUBA
gown by Jonathan Cohen, purse by Rauwolf

Photo: Steve Granitz/WireImage

Great colors, but it seems boxy and strangely baggy around Uzo’s waist.

ZOË KAZAN
gown and purse by Miu Miu

Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty

Careful! If you scroll up and down this dress too quickly, your eyeballs will literally explode.

GWENDOLINE CHRISTIE
gown by Giles

Photo: John Shearer/WireImage

Brienne of Tarth, man. Even a snooze of a dress takes on this whole dramatic, ancient, glorious goddess vibe when she puts it on. It’s just awesome.

CHRISTINE BARANSKI
gown by Zac Posen

Photo: Frazer Harrison/Getty

Good color, decent silhouette, terrible fit. Love the shoes.

ROBIN WRIGHT

Photo: Dan Steinberg/Invision/AP

Listen, Robin Wright, I’m happy for you that your body simply refuses to age, but this just looks like futuristic underwear.

JULIA LOUIS-DREYFUS
gown by Safiyaa

Photo: Frazer Harrison/Getty

Ambien in dress form.

EDIE FALCO
gown by Prada

Photo: Steve Granitz/WireImage

What is she, a child bride?

CHELSEA PERETTI
gown by Gabriela Cadena

Photo: Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP

An Urban Outfitters sale rack in the mid-aughts.

SOPHIE TURNER
jumpsuit by Galvan

Photo: Frazer Harrison/Getty

NO, SANSA. NO. Ladypants are wonderful, but if they don’t fit, there is no excuse for that bullshit. Get it together.

TARYN MANNING
gown by Rubin Singer

Photo: Steve Granitz/WireImage

Taryn, I generally don’t condone violence, but I want you to go find your hairstylist and punch him in the face.

Worst DressedHEIDI KLUM
gown by Atelier Versace

Photo: Steve Granitz/WireImage

THIS IS THE WOMAN WHOM WE HAVE LET JUDGE A FASHION COMPETITION FOR ELEVEN YEARS. For the love of God. No wonder Trump is still up in the polls. I would blame this dress on all of us, for letting such a monstrosity occur, for not intervening in Heidi Klum’s wardrobe sooner. But it’s so horrific that I cannot in good faith take credit for it. Even we are not this talented at fucking things up.


© Democracy Diva, 2015.
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4 responses to 2015 Emmy Awards, Part 3

  1. I like the green jumpsuit too…

    But I wish I could unsee Heidi’s…whatever that is. She looks like she was rolling in a fish net in the woods during fall….

  2. Eric

    My god Heidi!!!

    Here is probably the most accurate recap of her outfit::

    “If you put a dead canary, a piss-stained ice skating costume, a Victorian lady’s housecoat, Liberace’s dining room curtains, a memaw’s teddy, thirty scoops of ugly and Big Bird’s jizz into a blender and pulsed for 10 seconds, you’d get the mess that Heidi Klum wore to the Emmys today.”

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